Taking The Time To Say Hello, To Say Goodbye, I Am Sorry And I Love You.

They say that whatever doesn't kill you makes one stronger. I had my doubts for a while. The moment I heard that my husband and childhood sweetheart had been taken away from me, my world stopped. I was devastated and inconsolable when I heard the terrible news that my love had been killed in Afghanistan. Time has passed and I am better now, but I always think to myself, why did I not tell him I loved him more often, I often think I should have laughed more at his jokes, he had a great sense of humor.

If I had known, every time I hugged him I would have done it for a little longer and cherished the moment. I think about the times I did not say I am sorry over our disagreements, why did I need to be right, well it's not that important anymore to be right. Somehow the last time I seen him, I even think that I did not properly say goodbye to him. It is hard to be strong when someone special leaves your life, and it doesn't get any easier with practice. I am writing this story because I learned that life is but a fleeting moment and to say that we must be kinder to those we love and to take the time for them, even if you are too busy, tommorow may not be here for all of us.
spicyforever8 spicyforever8
26-30, F
14 Responses Sep 7, 2011

Your husband signed that "blank check" that all who have served have signed. And we are the freer and we are the safer because he gave us his all. But in his doing so, you have given us that which you should have never have had to give. And I grieve with you, and offer my condolences. I have a cousin on "The Wall." A "brown water" sailor, he and one of his shipmates were casualties when their mine sweeping boat was ambushed in the Mekong Delta.

I do hope that with time you will find some comfort in knowing that he gave his all not only for his country, not only for his brothers-in-arms, but primarily for you, and for your safety. "Greater love hath no man..." Perhaps someday we will be able to beat our swords into plowshares.

Grace and peace to you and your child.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Genuine hug}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<br />
I am struck at times by stories such as this.<br />
We speak of loss, and pain. Valid feelings they are, very valid indeed.<br />
But often what strikes me is what is not said. That you, through this experience, have given to all of us the gift of freedom through the blood of your wonderfully loved and selfless husband. You gave him up to be used by us to accomplish the noble goal of democracy, and to secure our freedom.<br />
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Thank you.<br />
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From the depth of my heart, to the tips of my toes, thank you for allowing your man to stand on that wall and say not on my watch. No one will hurt you tonight, and to give his life doing it.<br />
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Thank you for your gift to us of freedom.

So sorry for your loss, i wish you the luck of the Irish for your future.

Thank you and the luck of the Irish goes a long way. Lol

The man I love went away to war too. I was very lucky because he did come back. What he survived through amazes me, what he saw and had to do breaks my heart. He did share with me that the thing that was said most by dying soldiers was "promise me you will tell my wife how much I love her" they weren't concerned with the times you had to be right or rushed through the goodbyes what they last thought of is what you now think of...how much you loved one another. That is a testament to the power of love. I hope this gives you some comfort.

Thank you very much sharing your wisdom, it did help me and I wish you and your man peace in your lives.

sorry to hear about your husband. My wife died 6 years ago. I know the pain you feel because I have had the same feelings.

Sorry to hear about your wife and thank you for sharing.

I am indeed sorry for your loss. Having served, I know all to well how last goodbyes somehow never seem good enough in retrospect. Thanks for reminding us what we take for granted.<br />
Hope you enjoy your time here on EP...Great stories....Would be honored if you added me :)

Thank you for having served and for your good thoughts.

I'm new to EP, but when browsing I came across your story and was touched by it. As someone who has never had to suffer such a loss I cannot hope to understand the pain you have experienced, nor can I hope to offer words to make that pain easier. I can only say that when my wife and I had our first child, one of the first thoughts that came to me was that we had achieved, in some tangible way, immortality. Through your son, your husband is immortal. As you bring up the boy I hope that you will see his father reflected in his attitudes, behaviour, and in looks. I pray that time will heal for you, that life will offer you new riches, and that God will bless you and your son.

Thank you for taking the time to share your thought, wonderful :-)

Thank you for sharing your experience. You are so right. I am sorry for your loss.

Thank you for the kind thoughts

Thanks for sharing perspective of your life. Short but applicable to all of us as well.

Thank you

I feel for you that you have realized some things when it is too late to correct between you and him.I do think it has made you a much much better person because you know a lot more about be a giving person,to not be selfish,to want to make others happy.Those are great qualities to have and yours have been enhanced because of what has happened to you.I wish that he did not die and you still had him but we can't change that unfortunately but I am impressed by how you have come through such a terrible loss.Thank you for sharing and I hope you write more stories and share them.

Thank you for your wisdom it is appreciated

Darling, I am first very sorry to hear about your loss......and you are right, life is but a fleeting moment, a moment we must cherish, enjoy and utilize in the best way possible. I often get caught up in the 'what if's' in life, ultimately missing out on a moment that may impact my life forever. <br />
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Now, as for your sweetheart, I have NO doubt that he knew how you felt about him, he knew each time you hugged him, kissed him, spoke his name that you loved him and cherished him. In turn, he left this world knowing he had been loved, truly loved by what appears to be a very incredible woman! I have to believe that there must be some sense of contentment knowing, even when leaving this world, that you have experienced one of the greatest gifts in life, true love! <br />
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You both have been blessed!!!<br />
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Your comment is very powerful and uplifting and it lead me to tears of joy!

rather believing that failures makes one stronger, its better believing live your life as if there is no tomorrow... we often forget to realise how much important each moments in our lives are... we all do want to reach the old age and remember our happier times... but my dear friend... you must also realise that had your hubby known that he wont be there anymore beside you, he would have always wished to see you happy forever even after he is gone...

Thank you for taking the time to comment on my story. I am such an optimist that I can get on your nerves. Lol

I'm so sorry. Believe me, I know firsthand what you're going through. Read my story about my Second Love when you have the time. Be patient with yourself and give yourself time, but look ahead and know he would want you to live. Take care, and know you're not alone.

Thank you, my story although sad indeed is meant to encourage people to enjoy each day to the fullest and to be grateful at all times for what we have. I am a very positive person and realize that is our only option in life.

You now know the most important thing to learn in life. It is shorter than you think even if you live a long time. With what I now know I do things very differently. Add me if you wish, I would like that.

Thank you for your comment.