Hold Up...

agree completely, and with the abuse im sure some of these kids in families with no money, just a matter of time, before a new group of pshycopathes appear..

There are definitely children who need help, but one of the things that helped my wife decide to retire from teaching when she did was the problems with the constant expansion of the definition of children with problems--and the fact that the children knew they were diagnosed and so used that as a reason for being rude, not doing their schoolwork, and otherwise misbehaving. I can't count the number of times she'd come home and tell a story about some child who would misbehave and then look at her and say something like, "But I can't help it, I've been diagnosed with (fill in the blank)." It was amazing how many of these children suddenly became good students in her class when they were told that being diagnosed was not an excuse and that if they didn't behave and try their best they'd either fail or be sent to the office for misbehaving. Obviously, some children need special consideration, but many when given rules and structure can perform fine.

I think the issue is that there are a lot of parents that believe that their children need special treatment because of some diagnosis.



The truth is... children DO need special treatment... by the people that know them most... THEIR PARENTS.



My kids are different. They have some of the same foibles that my wife and I have. So, do I medicate them? No. I teach them the same coping mechanisms that I continue to refine.



There's a saying that sailors use: "you can't change the wind, you can merely adjust your sails."



Too many people expect that with a given diagnosis, that little Jane or Johnny should be handled as exceptions. It's lazy parenting.



Of course, there are extremes. Some kids need extra attention. Some kids may even need medication. But overall, it's not that the conditions don't exist, it's that there are many parents that refuse to be parents.

I don't now if anyone bothered to notice but this post was made before the author actually posted anything to substantiate any claims. The fiery commentary was premature and does reflect strongly on the anyone who acts in this way.

Mixed feelings on this subject. As a child I was born deaf. I went thru a few operations that restored, corrected my hearing. My learning curve for speech skills were way behind other children my age. In school I was classifried as being "retarded" and was placed in a special ed class. My parents fought to have me restored to regular class that I was in. And I was relocated. All because of poor speech skills. That is what they based their tests on. Of course todays testing methods are more improved. But it is still kind of scary how they can place someone in special ed. that will affect them for the rest of their lives.

Well said! I completely agree These disorders are real although there seems to be many people who are misdiagnosed due to laziness or just a quick fix. But just because of the times that they were wrong doesn't mean that those conditions don't exist. I've known many people that it has helped out and they would have had a much harder time if it wasn't for their meds.

Very well said. As you know I have been working in Children's MH for the past 12 years ages 4 to 19. As you have stated there are true childhood disorders and children who have them. Sadly there are MH professionals that like to pathologize every type of behavior out there. Some kids are just testing limits with their parents which is normal but the parents are too damn lazy to set boundaries and enforce. There are kids who should NOT be on medication and just need some good old parenting!!! I have seen both kinds come through our agency. In reality, the children get labeled with the disorder BUT IT IS THE PARENT THAT NEEDS THE MOST HELP!!!

This group reminds me of my best friend's know it all mom. She has no degree in this field and she herself has some major undiagnosed disorders (Narcissitic Personality Disorder for one). She thinks because she beat and berated her kids when they were young she knows what she is talking about! I could go on and on about this but I won't because this subject is a passion of mine that is near and dear to my heart.

I will end with this I am proud to say that the non-profit agency I work for is good at realizing which kids have actual disorders that need some help (not necessarily medication; we as an agency do not have the capacity to prescribe meds) and kids whose parents are over reacting. Are focus is strengths based I might add. Ok I am done now.

you also forget "Autistic spectrum" that covers an abundance of problems from severe autistic throught Asberghers syndrome to the ADHD and ADD yes children with autistic tendancies usually get help as this is the easiest to diagnose then the ADHD and ADD the hardest to diagnose is Asberghers which cannot be diagnosed till at least 11,Autistic is within months,Adhd,ADD about 4-6 yrs but some ADD aspects could be Asberghers b ut schools will hesitate as EBD schools cost and they try to keep kids in mainstream as its cheapest option.A child in residentual school will cost in excess of £200,000 per year .

The title *does* say "mostly" fictional.

*brings in another tier so that Ms Feisty's soapbox is way higher*



I have no idea why someone would actually voice this type of erroneous opinion...since there is overwhelming medical evidence to the contrary. In my son's case...he was born a month early...which can sometimes pose problems later down the road. In his case...he had a very real medical condition...which yours truly monitored with the help of several qualified specialists over a 2 year period before medication was ever decided upon. He was also tested to make sure that a medication would really be helpful in his specific case. It was...so that's the direction we went. And my son thrived because of it.



I really wish people would be more informed...and get their ducks in a row before spouting off such ridiculous words. *big sigh*



Thanks for standing up and voicing your opinion on such a worthy topic Girlfriend. ((Big Hugs)) :)

Was raised in "normal family" with traditional approaches and tended to think that the children with issues were a reflection of parenting... Of course as fate would have it our oldest son has been diagnosed Aspberger's / Type 2 mood disorder and ADHD on top of it... early on tried all of the traditional tools. Clearly this is something totally different that's happening with some children.... Think it's parenting??? Try taking a look at siblings. You'll notice that, like with us, same parents, same house, same diet and two totally different outcomes... Thanks for your post!

great post. I have a nephew with autism and ADHD....I know from experience that they are REAL. However it took years and years of doctors appointments, meetings with his teachers, principal, and counselors at school before he was formally diagnosed with anything. I agree with you that many doctors label a child as ADHD, and medicate them, without spending the time to thoroughly "examine" each individual child. Some kids are more active than others....some are bored....some seek attention....etc....not all have a disorder and need meds. I'm glad you shared this! xo

Thank you for saying this, alot of people think that children diagnosed with disorders are just kids acting out or just being odd but there's a completely different level of understanding that those people will never be able to comprehend because the complexities of life 'go over their heads' since they are ignorant to the many mysteries of life which disorders in children is one.

I agree with your point of view. :| Sadly, it's like this how things are...

So I guess a child with Autism is just faking it to get a sick day. Figures.

as a single father of a child diagnosed with ADHD and Oppositional Defiant Disorder I agree. That is very superb of you for voicing what you felt was right to say. Not many people would stand up for something they believe in. Great going into detail. Very beautiful and to the point.

It's good that you care enough to express yourself in detail my friend.

*stands in your corner cheering*