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If You Are Honest

One of the great things about the internet is that people can really get to know each other. 

You can avoid the trap of being extremely physically attracted to someone and then finding out that you really don't have that much in common. 

Then once you do exchange photos you can decide if you can live with someone not being that perfect model gorgeous because they feed you mentally and spiritually. 

findinme findinme 46-50, F 9 Responses Feb 8, 2008

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"feed you mentally and spiritually"- perfectly said!)

My mother always said never marry someone for their looks. She spoke from experience, as my dad was considered quite good - looking, tho he was an emotionally abusive person.

Words is most importent to feeling

I totally agree with what you write - BUT - the keyword is *HONEST*.<br />
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I can't tell the number of times that I have done the online dating thing only to find out that the man looks nothing like his photo - and it isn't even that I am all that in to how a person looks. If they lied about that which is going to be so obvious when and if you meet - makes me wonder what else they have not been honest about.<br />
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I married my late husband who was 5'3 1/2" tall and over 220 lbs!! So not LOOKING for just what some consider being the perfect example of physical manhood. Not against it, but there is more to life than just looks. Gravity will indeed have its way with all that can't and don't do surgery.<br />
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If a person is really honest, they want a person that they can talk to, be honest with and know that they are honest with them. A person that you can laugh with as well as cry with. Someone that just by virtue of them being in a relationship with you makes you want to be a better person - you’re better for knowing them. <br />
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But to think that everyone is going to be honest and upfront in his or her conversation with someone - Internet or in person - is naive. Not a bad quality, but one that could end up bringing about more pain that you thought possible.

i truely believe that appearances doesn't matter. i love who a person is, that is, who they are<br />
on the inside. that is what really matters. 'beauty is only skin deep' goes a long way with me.

Bravo findinme !!! Very clear.<br />
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Francessca, I've also seen the opposite happen. People create a mental and spiritual bond, but never go anywhere because one half couldn't be seen with the other appearance wise.

well said.

I think so too but in my first marriage, I let sexual attraction get in the way.

Sometimes you become extremely physically attracted to someone because they feed you mentally and spiritually. In my opinion, that is the best of both worlds.