Let Me Be a Slob Sometimes

Ive recently given birth to my third daughter, having had two previous children who were huge babies 9lb and 10lb i managed to lose all my baby weight and return to my pre pregnancy size 10 figure, on the third occasion the minute i came out of the hospital home, my partner turned to me and asked when i was going to do some exersises. I presumed he meant pelvic floor ones, but no he actually had the audasity to me for my tummy! I couldnt believe this was a issue so soon after giving birth, i dont want to make out that he is a bad man, on the contary he his very loving towards me and a fantastic father to our children but i had never seen this side to him before, it wasnt as if i didnt quickly shed my weight when i had the other two. Anyhow over the last few days ive had nothing but pressure to get back into shape quickly, i felt so hurt and only then realised just how much of a trophy wife i was. On one occasion when i tried to be intimate with him he rebuffed my advances saying he will find me more attractive when ive got my figure back! I was sad, hurt and angry, im sick of all the pressure, i will tone up when im ready i wouldnt mind but ive only gone up two dress sizes, sorry for the rant but i thnk some men shouldnt put on this pressure to be perfect.  

Blondevixon Blondevixon
31-35, F
10 Responses Aug 20, 2008

Haha! Didimarjeta! You are right, he is 35 and to be honest goes to the gym 3 times a week to avoid him looking like the one who as just given birth! The ironic thing is i have now managed to lose just about all my baby weight, and sadly he has put quite a bit on!

I "only" had 2 kids, so cant comment on what having a third does to your body. But it is not easy getting your figure/shape back after 1 or 2. <br />
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Plus, there is also the fact that age (god forbid I should utter the word, but it is relevant so here goes) does have an impact on our ability to get into shape or keep it once we've got there.<br />
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Is he over 30? If not, then he is in for a big surprise when he hits that barrier - my ex-husband (and every other male I've known) suddenly had a hard time staying in shape, his gut got bigger, and his weight seemed to shift down around his waist and hips. <br />
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I hope this happens to your man, to the nth degree!

Thanks pitman! There are still areas i think need a little more work, but thats to be expected after 3 kids!

Thanks pitman! There are still areas i think need a little more work, but thats to be expected after 3 kids!

i think you look fantastic, you have a very beautiful body.

Thanks ohnudeone, i know youre right, the strange thing is my hubby was always up for making love during my pregnancy even when i got huge. It was me that felt unatractive and therefore it killed my sexdrive. Thats why i was so shocked over his attitude after. Three months on, ive almost regained my figure, but have done so at my own pace. And christiangirl, i have thought of what you said about what would happen if i gained weight due to illness, and in that case if he didnt like me like that he would know where the door was!

Atlanta, <br />
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I am not about to apologize for the male species, but that really sucks. Give him a child and he wants you back to trophy immediately? What happened to loving YOU for who YOU ARE, not what you look like? Frankly, we loved pregnancy sex, and post pregnancy sex. It was great fun, not to mention the added cream in my coffee in the morning. Ewww. (that is a story for an other time). He is just a damned fool to not know what he has.

I found after the birth unlike with my previous 2 who were huge, i felt almost like i hadnt even given birth, i felt so great with no soreness or anything. It was actually about when my baby was about 2 weeks old i first wanted sex, after been pregnant for so long that seemed to kill my sex drive, so i guess after i felt i had 9 months of horniness to make up for! Shame i was rejected, its something you dont forget.

wow.. Altanta.. im so sorry that you have a man that is so superfical, no woman deserves that kind of abuse! what if something happend to you that made you gain so much weight and you couldnt loose it? (for example thyroid problem, medication reations, if you had a accident and couldnt exercise) would he still be with you or want you? he is suppost to love you for who you are.. i believe in trying to stay fit and healthy.. but for him to tell you to loose weight right after giving birth.. is so beyond unsensitve and horrible.. its hard for me to contain my self. my heart goes out to you.. take care and God bless.

Thanks cse2008, i was really suprised by it, im almost back to my pre baby weight, 3 months on, but its something i will never forget.