I Think To Much.....

Honestly, some days i over think, i mean, yeah i think everyday about the everday struggles i go through. but alot of the time, i think way to much.
Like last night for example. I have been going through a hard time for the past month about me and a real close friend of mine. we have not talked, and we have not even looked at each other the same the past month, and it has been killing me on the inside out.. and the thing i have been thinking about alot lately , was being single while alot of my friends are in relationships. I'm kind of the jealous type,so seeing my friends so happy, it makes me happy for them, but it seems like they have not been wanting to pay any attention to me anymore, and they pay all attention to the one they love.And me not having love and affection to anyone, i feel so alone, like always.
Oh yeah, so about that rant there, i tend to sometimes rant a little. But anyways back to last night...as i was going over those things i mentioned up there^ I was just thinking about it all, and i started to cry, and everyone cries sometimes, but for the first time in months i cried and i couldn't stop. I felt so alone, and so lost, i felt not wanted in peoples lives, and i just didn't know what to do about anything anymore..sometimes i do still think about if i wasn't here i would be better of, and people would be better off if i wasn't here either.
I over think to the point where i just cry constantly, and i can't stop, i find it hard to breath, and i feel like i'm going to die.
thinking isn't supposed to be this bad, but really when i actually lay there in my bed, and over think everything that has happened , i feel like life is just a big waste of space...
cherrylover1234 cherrylover1234
18-21, F
Nov 28, 2012