Unknown Blue Folks warning me about ep romances and dramas I have no interest in... Update at bottom of post.

This is actually directed at one of those blue peeps who just turned up in a pm with a "WARNING" for me....
That's nice if you care and I appreciate it but I just want to set the record straight on a few things before the mud gets any deeper....

I always think it's sort of sketchy when folks need to pull out their "blue persona" to try and "warn" me about stuff.  My buddies share their thoughts with me all the time right from their regular profiles... That said...I have NOOO idea what you're talking about. The man you mentioned is new to my circle but has been nothing shy of a total doll to me.  Bright and articulate and  as polite as can be.  If there is  some drama I got NO clue about it!!

I would have sent this in a pm to you but I'm a "red-dotter" and your settings won't let me.  Not enough room in a card to say what I wanted to  and I couldn't post on your wb either...

I TOTALLY do NOT get into the romance dramas in here.  I have MY hubs and  that's ALL I need.   I don't deal with internet boyfriends so, who does what to whoever is a field I don't play in.  If I see a budding romance I TOTALLY support BOTH sides in them finding their love.  I LOVE to see folks in love!

I talk to folks about sex all the time but don't deal with folks writing sexy stories about me or  too me. I got NO sexy stories for my recent birthday...  The buddies I swap thoughts with are just that . Adults sharing info....  The person you mentioned has never said BOO to me about sex....So if there is a warning in all of this to be had....It might just be YOU who needs to be watched.    Not being snotty here just honest.  I am a big girl and can sort out who is trouble and who isn't pretty well and when I get a little sloppy with it....my hubs is not shy in telling me!!  He reads everything I write in here if he wants including pm's....

Thanks for caring.....if that's what this was about...but I deal with folks on a whole different level then what you might be implying....


The person who needed to read this has.  I was gonna delete the story.. cause it really was just passing on a message but instead I've decided to throw a few more thoughts out on this subject. I think it's important to know where  other folks stand on certain issues and we ALL know this is one of the "stickier" ones in here. 

I have said it before but it's worth repeating. I have  buddies who are friends with folks I have backed away from for one reason or another and  some I have Blocked....That is TOTALLY cool cause different people have different tolerances for some things and different people form different types of friendships.  That's the way it rolls in the "grown up" world!!  I have close friends who aren't even in my circle cause one of us doesn't care much for what the other one writes but on other levels we're  fine and can talk for hours....Different dynamics for different peeps!!  It ROCKS!  Diversity is AWESOME!!

That said.....I have also gotten messages from girls asking me NOT to send gestures like "blowing kisses" or with "bear hugs" to their cyber bfs...OK..so I do giggle about this....  It's a gesture.....an icon I "click"  I'm really NOT trying to snag your man!!  I already have one who I think is just freakin NIFTY and have no interest in anyone elses!! But for the sake of harmony...I don't send gestures to the bf's and usually back away from BOTH!!  Sometimes the person saying, there is a BIG relationship going on hasn't let the OTHER party in on it tho!!  So sometimes it's good to ask the other party and see what their thoughts are.  Some folks lie like rugs in here and say whacky stuff just because they don't even want you to have ANY sort of simple or innocent conversation with  somebody they've staked out as THEIRS!  Scary?  You bet!

But it's worth the  nonsense to meet the AWESOME folks and there are plenty of them on ep too!!!  My circle is loaded with them, I am happy to say! 

I do make it a point to try and keep pace with what a lot of my buddies write.  It's not uncommon to see me comment on everything certain folks write.  This is equally distributed  between  guy and gal buddies cause it is all about how interesting what the person is writing about.  Some folks ALWAYS interest me!!  It doesn't mean I want to have them as a romantic interest....I'm already MARRIED to my romantic interest and  he is in here too.  I make no secret on how crazy about my hubs I am either.  So when I make a new buddy and post on a bunch of their stories it's me getting to know the person.....  I almost feel silly writing this cause it is just sooooo common sense to me but it's NOT that way for others  so I just figured I'd  help folks know me a little better. 

It's all I can offer.  I don't pass out real time contact info and never will.  There are wonderful folks in here  and sometimes those wonderful folks buddy up with some pretty un-wonderful types and that is how info gets passed that shouldn't be passed and if I NEVER give the info to ANYONE I will ALWAYS be safe!  It's a really simple and effective way for me to enjoy the  site!!  It WORKS really well for me too!

sierra33 sierra33
31-35, F
17 Responses May 7, 2012

Aww thanks again Kassie!! I loved reading your comments! You sound like a Fun-Floozy!!

I had to laugh about the whole "get you finger spanked" when it came to certain gestures. While I think there are a couple you should use some common sense with...blowing kisses and bear hugs would not be it. *rolls eyes* I'm a freakin' floozy if I'm not suppose to be blowing kisses and bear hugging people. I'm just saying. Oh well...I guess that's what makes EP even more interesting I suppose. The EP relationship tree is vast and complicated and not for the faint of heart. Excellent writing as always Sierra. :)

Yeah it got all sugar and chocolate hearts in here... and the term the house ninja... loves it.


There are way too many witch hunts on here. I have been hit by some weirdos here..my avatar is too suggestive..really..stop looking then! If the boyfriends are nice to me, I am nice back! Do not like m stories..you do not have to read. It is sad the levels of drama found here! There is too much drama in life, I come here to have fun. I am finally beginning to see the beauty of the BLOCK button! LOL<br />
<br />
Renamed that beautiful button to...DRAMA BE GONE....:)

Sometimes I don't even know I am a target till some one else sends me a link to some rotten stuff someone has said about me. I stick pretty close to my own buddies but some folks get really mad when you refuse to get involved in their nonsense or cater to their psychological issues and then they launch some sort of whacked out attack. I don't care if they say they hate me cause that's their own opinion and business it's the out and out lies that bug me but I post my say and let everybody else decide. I'm here to enjoy myself and learn about folks and what they do and just don't have any time for the other stuff. I have found that like 90% of people already know when a person does this. They might not confront them but they know when folks are a little...."off" ;)
I love your name for the Block button... The DBG!! AWESOME!! :D

homenudie.....what drama???? You don't get blocked!! evah!!

We would just get your mistress to punish you anyhow! LOL

looking4, Awwww......You're TOTALLY blowin our cover here rough guy!! Now everbody's gonna know YOU are just my "sissy boy" and I AM THE NINJA in our house!! Darn!!!! :D<br />
<br />
I'll have hiccups for sure when I get done laughin this one off!! :D<br />
<br />
But seriously....I am a little bit of a tyrant on this one subject. I have seen so many peoples hearts pulled right out of their chests for taking crap like this. Not just fun flirting.....But the ones where the partner makes it all too known that they think other people are wayyyy better then the partner they are with. <br />
<br />
I always think it's a very insecure person who pulls this too Cause secure people do not need to constantly hurt someone they claim to love. If BOTH parties want to have other partners fine but when ONE partner pulls it after telling their partner they're monogamous....Then that is where the problems and pain come in. <br />
<br />
I just don't play second fiddle and I don't want sloppy seconds. If I can't have ALL of it then I don't want any......This attitude has served me pretty well so far... so I think I'll hang onto it!! I sorta like havin my own "hard ***" ways in dealing with some things!! It's nice knowing I'm a good match for YOU too! ♥

Sie--<br />
For any who may doubt the utterly--alpha--vein that runs through that sleek form of yours--<br />
You most assuredly--<br />
shed light on it with this last posting.<br />
All should note:<br />
I stated that if Sierra were to flirt--<br />
with a gentleman in a way I found unacceptable--<br />
I would engage in a conversation with her--<br />
Then I would--<br />
evaluate and discern any shortcomings--<br />
on my part that--<br />
could have fostered her need for this behavior.<br />
Sie--clearly stated--<br />
She would--<br />
without hesitation--<br />
show me the door!<br />
Now--<br />
who is the hard *** in this union? =D<br />
She is the ideal match for me--<br />
In every way!

looking4, EXACTLY!! The BIGGEST problems with couples is NEVER "other" people....The trouble ALWAYS sits right in between the 2 people involved!!<br />
<br />
I have to agree with you on saying I wouldn't take you being all cute and flirty with other women if they were making some kind of cheap "play" for ya. I wouldn't. Smiling and being friendly and sweet ROCKS but if you started getting all crushy on some chick I'd totally let ya have her. I don't compete and I wouldn't play little miss tearful or second fiddle to you or any other man for pullin crap like that. <br />
<br />
I've made it thru 34 years and never dealt with it...I wouldn't start now!!<br />
If I can't be #1...then I'd hit the pavement.....I'd be broken hearted but I'd still be gone cause sticking it out when your partner is all into other folks is something that ends up shredding your self respect and I wouldn't let that happen.... I LOVE you but only as long as your love supports me. I TOTALLY believe it has to work the same way with YOU and it better cause you're a stickler on this stuff too! Maybe even MORE then me!! Good thing we see eye to eye!!<br />
<br />
I think it's different for different folks tho. polyamorous folks run their relationships differently, more liberal and that's cool for them.....it just wouldn't work for us.. <br />
<br />
You got my "FULL" attention pretty darn quick!! It was just moving in with you and later on getting married that I was a little hesitant on.....But you brought me right around to your way of thinkin!! ;) ♥ ♥ ♥

Sie--<br />
You bring up a key factor and highly valid point--<br />
in this ongoing discussion of partners fighting off potential--threats--<br />
to their pairing with another.<br />
If one partner feels the need to fend off competition--<br />
from proximity to their significant other--<br />
then that individual needs to work through their trust issues--<br />
with their mate--<br />
rather then arguing with those showering the attentions.<br />
I have dismissed two staff members--<br />
due to their overt fixation with my wife.<br />
This only occurred after--<br />
Sie's repeatedly telling them to end their behaviors.<br />
At that point--<br />
Their actions showed a decided lack of respect for both--<br />
she and I and--<br />
I will not tolerate that.<br />
I feel it is--my--responsibility to discourage women from harassing me with their unwanted sexual or romantic agendas.<br />
My ego does not require the attentions of others--<br />
in that fashion.<br />
I am utterly contented with my wife.<br />
To allow them to continue with these overt gestures or coy words<br />
or worse yet--<br />
respond to their agendas--<br />
would be highly insulting to my wife.<br />
For as delightfully sweet as my charming wife is--<br />
Make no mistake--<br />
she would dump my sorry *** in a single heartbeat--<br />
were I to play this game.<br />
She was highly selective before me.<br />
She would continue to be so if I failed to show her the respect and loyalty she deserves and expects.<br />
She is the first and only woman who made me--sweat--<br />
in obtaining her--full--attention.<br />
I relish this trait in her!<br />
I feel the same way myself.<br />
I would--never--expect to find her disrespecting me in this way either.<br />
If I did--<br />
I would not confront the man.<br />
I would question my wife--<br />
and then further question myself--<br />
to uncover what I was doing to cause her to look elsewhere for these attentions.

Thank you myah06. So true.

Is it weird that I get amused when I see others flirt with my husband?

I get a kick out of it too! So if you're weird Dente....so am I!! :D

Penn, if you rubbed MY *** and said that... longgggg before K got too ya I'd have put you right in your place...... It's NOT what a third party does or tries to do with a person's partner... it's what the PARTNER does in response to the action....<br />
<br />
All the fights woman have with other women is POINTLESS. A discussion needs to be had with the partner acting like the wanna run right off like some puppy in heat!! <br />
<br />
A goofy gesture doesn't count....If ep offered gestures like a blow job...that one I wouldn't send but I do HUG my buddies in real time and online.....I don't have to sleep with a person to hug them. I think more folks just have to get out in the world and see how things actually go with couples and climb out of their fantasies on the internet...<br />
<br />
Reality is AWESOME!!

I so enjoyed this response. It is very accurate! You were protecting yourself from mindless--*** grabbers--long before I came into the picture. You still do a most admirable job of it too! Bravo--my love.

looking4. You bet!! I learned wayyy back when how to make pushy idiots step right on back!! :D

That just totally fit right in with some of our recent conversations!! We're still on the same page jmo!! :)

I'm not mindless!! Ok... well... maybe sometimes I am. lol. I agree... AWESOME answer. :-) You are a lucky man my friend.

Penn...occasional.."mindlessness" is almost REQUIRED as being fully human!! :D

2 More Responses

Just so that I understand....<br />
<br />
If I walk up behind Sie and slowly rub her *** while whispering, "hi sexy" in her ear... looking won't get jealous?<br />
<br />
Hmmmmm... opens up a whole new world of possibilities....

Wow a lot of really good points!<br />
<br />
One I found interesting is the "stay away from my cyber boyfriend"<br />
<br />
This is interesting and disturbing...<br />
<br />
The threat essentially implies that people can be "owned"... and that interaction with other people is somehow an affront to this ownership...<br />
<br />
Love is a feeling and an experience... why are people turning it into a "duty" or "obligation"... true love involves trust and freedom... these jealous zealots malign love with these behaviors and threats....

Some women just like to blame other women. Honestly, I believe the really jealous ones are closeted bi-sexuals that truly enjoy the heated exchange with another woman. Bow-chick-wow-wow!!!!

It's NOT about the person "sending" a gesture that is the problem...but the how the person receiving it responds... Some women think by blocking their men in and telling other women NOT to talk to them they safe guard the relationship....It doesn't makes a lot of folks just want to escape and if a person wants to cheat they will.....I just don't put clicking a goofy icon on the internet in that league.....

Thanks DenteAvvelenato, You're sooo right!! Love needn't be guarded....It happens and stays...if the people involved really are "involved" and do love each other...

I think its nice you back away from guys when their girlfriends get uppity about it...but, it sucks that you are forced to miss out on a friendship cause some girlfriend feels threatened anytime a female talks or interacts with her boyfriend... noone should have to put up with that.

Penn you made **** music... I didn't know you had that talent...teeheehee

jmoI don't know anything about what "most" folks can do but I can honestly just LOVE a man to bits for so many AWESOME traits and never once want to go to bed with them.....I need a special sort of chemistry for that and being I already have it with hubs it's never an issue for me. I do have a lot of great male friends and while I think if I were single they might feel differently right now they are great platonic buddies....They know who I am and respect me for it and I have TOTAL appreciation for them... But on the other hand I don't get all crazy when someone jokes with me or sends a flirty gesture.....to me that's just what adults do and it can be done for fun and with good taste and never cross any lines. Some folks are VERY sensitive tho so it does pay to be a little cautious....or maybe a LOT!! :D

I love flirting as long as everyone involved knows its only innocent flirting.... okay maybe innocent isn't the right word...but I flirt for fun and I think its fun to flirt.

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Perfect. I especially love the update. I have knowledge of a few "relationships" where one party had no idea there was one. I think we need to temper the gestures. I love to play with them and even do cryptic communications with them, but with some friends I fear a misenterpretation on the intent can lead to problems.

Thanks Irish...I have to admit that the longer I'm here the less I worry about ticking someone off with a gesture. I'm polite and pretty nice in what I comment on and if someone is hyper paranoid possessive....it's not my concern. I just keep being me and dodging bullets. :D Even when I don't send gestures some folks just have a need to hate me....but it's ok cause I don't waste my time hating them and I sorta like me and that counts for wayyy more!!

well it is the old "why should she be happy when I am not!" attitude.

Ahem...about that cryptic gesture you sent me the other day...lol. I'm just teasing ya Irish. Gesture away my Friend. *Cheshire Kat Grin*

well we could use some fresh new gestures.
some that allow use to express how we feel, both positive and negative. It is not that I **** people off, but when I say "I adore you" does not mean I am in love, just that I think your a pretty special person. lol

1 More Response

gray....I gotta say...I didn't even go through some of this nonsense in HS! :D Then again...I avoided the same sort of folks in HS I try to avoid on ep! ep is a little easier tho cause all I have to do in here is click an icon and it goes away.....HS involved a little more effort! :D

looking4, aww thanks for double checking on this. I love it when you do that!! ♥ I agree, if a person is being honest they step right up and say what they have to say without all the sneaky cloak and dagger crap.... You're right too...if folks know you drag the crap outta the closet the wacky attention seekers and trouble makers, keep away from you and that is PERFECT as far as I'm concerned..... :)

Sie--<br />
As always--<br />
I applaud your honesty and forthright approach. <br />
The only way to combat future falsehoods--<br />
is with the utilization of present moment truths.<br />
Liars seek to avoid the more direct members of society.<br />
I thank you for forwarding these missives--in question--to myself.<br />
Whenever a person feels the need to hide their identity--<br />
They are seeking to raise--issues--<br />
where none currently exist.<br />
A person showing genuine concern would have no problem with--<br />
your knowing who they are.<br />
I took a few moments and glanced at the profiles of a few mentioned within the missives--<br />
The gentleman you are being--warned--against seems fine.<br />
Bravo--my love.

jmo, Yup......I am thinking the same thing. If someone is on the up & up they should be fine with using their regular profile. I have had a bunch of folks do that in the time I have been here. I was gonna delete this story once I found the person who needed to read it saw it but I might just be adding thoughts to it instead. <br />
<br />
The better folks come to understand how I think and communicate with others the better they get to know and understand what I will and won't tolerate and I think that's the best we can offer each other. Being this way also lets me sort out the BS artists who LOVE to drum up trouble for others because they rely on the "Internet secrecy" to keep them hidden......<br />
<br />
jacee, You're right on that too....I've bumped into a few of those folks too. One of my BEST buddies in here who I have known for over a year now I was warned repeatedly about. It turned out the one warning me and others was the BIGGEST liar around at that time..... I never use anyone's name in things like this but it is a good way to let folks see where I stand on issues like this.....That is good cause it takes me right out of the Bullcrap slingers and trouble makers orbit. Which is exactly where I like to be. I don't care if they are here and having their own brand of fun....as long as they don't try to drag me into it... I figure to each his own!!

I agree totally.............whatever floats their boat is fine with me, just don't try and hijack me on board lol

We will just keep ourselves... UN-hijack-able!! :D

I TOTALLY send EVERYBODY blown kisses and bear hugs!! :D NOW.....if I crack a whip atcha I mean some business..... :D

*now ya know I will crack a whip at everyone this week!!*

Sounds like sour grapes to me. Maybe this person was rebuffed by the one he/she is warning you to be careful of. Just a thought......