Its Not Ok


1) the act of intimidating a weaker person to make them do something,  

2) the act of intentionally causing harm to others, through verbal harassment, physical assault, or other more subtle methods of coercion such as psychological manipulation.

3)  the willful, conscious desire to put another under stress

Research indicates that adults who bully have personalities that are authoritarian, combined with a strong need to control or dominate. Further studies have shown that envy and resentment may be motives for bullying. Research on the self-esteem of bullies has produced equivocal results. While some bullies are arrogant and narcissistic, others can use bullying as a tool to conceal shame or anxiety or to boost self esteem: by demeaning others, the abuser him/herself feels empowered. Researchers have identified other risk factors such as depression and personality disorders, as well as quickness to anger and use of force, addiction to aggressive behaviors, mistaking others' actions as hostile, concern with preserving self image, and engaging in obsessive or rigid actions. Bullies may bully because they themselves have been the victim of bullying. (

justafewpixels justafewpixels
5 Responses Feb 8, 2010

I agree wholeheartedly with the last comment.

Bullying does not "toughen up" the victim, as many bullies would like to take credit for. At the very worst, it can be the cause of a suicide, injury or death. Most people become more distrustful and defensive of people, and some even become hostile with others, making them bullies. (Remember, many bullies were once bullied themselves) If someone is able to overcome the abuse, it is a remarkable personal achievement and not something that should be credited to the abuser in any way. It is like watching an animal climb out of dangerous quicksand and crediting only the mud's pull for the animal's success.

I agree with all of you. Bullies really need help. They probably don't realise how much harm they are causing to the victim. But that is no explanation for such a shameful act. I hate bullies and bullying!!

I like the fact that this is in the group "I think you need help".<br />
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Happy and content people do not bully. People who are satisfied with their lives do not bully. Bullies do indeed need help, just like the rest of us.<br />
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But having been at the other end so many times in my life, I personally have very little sympathy for bullies. It is a choice each and every time they harass and intimidate another person.

I think most bullies are in denial about their actions. They may classify it as 'all in good fun'. But it is plain and simple: If you do something that hurts someone emotionally or physically, and they ask you to stop, yet you continue, that is bullying, no matter how small the repeated offenses may seem. <br />
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It is actually the repetition of the behavior, and the promise of more, that is most distressing to the victims. <br />
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Many bullies blame the victim for being weak, that they need to 'toughen up' or 'lighten up'. This is a classic way of removing responsibility from themselves. The simple fact is, the bullies could simply stop their actions, but choose not to. <br />
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It is abuse.