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Naughty Yellow Pages

When I was thirteen years old my best friend & I started the Teen Sex & Adventure Club in my neighborhood (with an upper limit of eighteen or the end of the summer following Graduation from High School, which ever comes first).

Before I was thirteen we played LOTS of naughty kids games so starting a club wasn't really a big step, it was just more of what we were already doing.  And it is still going strong with a new generation of teens.  (Many exciting & hot memories!  I had more ******* by the time I was eighteen than many women dream of having in their entire lives!  Send private messages telling me how you learned about sex and how you figured out what turns you on and I may share my childhood experiences with you.)

College kept me busy (really, really busy!) but afterward I was bored until I got together with some other like-minded women (some from the original club, most members were new) and together we started the Womens Sex Club!  Everything the other women & I do in it is anonymous & secret.  I still missed the anything goes, boys & girls having wild sex and playing naughty games and the various group events or other social activities of my Teen Sex & Adventure Club.  So I've joined an adult party / swap / swing group as well.

And I've found an adult LARPing group that does clothing-optional roleplay -- adulteress whipped in the stocks, embarrassing visit to the doctor, family taken hostage, harem girls, hitchhiking, hypnosis, kidnapped couple, locked out, man or woman trained as a pet, slave girl put up for auction, Princess held for ransom, raped cheerleader, vestal virgin, skyclad warlocks & witches, Sleeping Beauty, ******** & humiliated teacher, nude protester, whatever we come up with that someone wants help acting out.

But those are different messages!  This story is mainly about something my Womens Sex Club does:  We encourage & help each other trade sex with workmen for home repairs & other jobs around the house!  And sometimes just for excitement & fun!

I wonder how many housewives have sex in their own homes with deliverymen or handymen or installers or repairmen to keep the money for themselves without their husbands knowing?  Or how many husbands have ordered their wives to expose themselves and/or give a stranger a ******* (or more!) as a tip or to get a discount on the bill?

I am single so even though I have hidden security cameras in my home, whenever I need something repaired or serviced around the house I call a wife from down the street or one of my girlfriends to come over while strangers are working in my home.  Or when one of them needs something done at her house, they call me and I go over there.  And sometimes there's three of us -- safety in numbers!

When the man (sometimes it's two men!) shows up we have already started playing without him, which is something that men pick up on right away!  We greet him at the door and invite him inside with our clits & nipples erect and our ******* fragrant & wet while wearing nothing except perfume and mens large dress shirts (almost) all the way unbuttoned.  Just try to find a man (or woman!) who doesn't think that look is really hot!

We make sure he knows we're turned on and (almost) naked and then I say "We can't pay you except with things like ******** or handjobs or letting you use your fingers & mouth on our breasts & ******* or giving us a spanking.  Or we will lick & suck or spank you or each other.  But no *******."  (That's just our opening offer but he doesn't know that!)

"If that's not enough you may finger & spank one or both of us for your trouble before you leave.  But if you stay, we will dance & ***** for you and ********** or use sex toys or do whatever you want to each other while you're working.  You can show us your **** or even work naked if you want to give us something to look at.  And when you're done, we'll have a naked ********* and do whatever you want to YOU.  But no *******.  And no money."

By that time we've walked him down the hall to the bathroom and taken out his **** and started undressing him for a shower!  Most men are more than willing to agree to our offer by then but if not we caress & kiss & make out with each other some more while he (tries to!) think it over.  I know it isn't fair but they REALLY can't resist when we put on their tool belt!

There are lots of ways to play this game and I've tried most of them at one time or another.  Tell me what would work on YOU!  Should I go braless and then spill the ice water or lemonade I got for you all over my now see-through top?  Or wear a short skirt with no panties?  Then sit at the kitchen table sipping coffee (or relaxing on the couch flipping through Cosmopolitan) with my legs open while pretending not to realize you're looking and you can see everything ?

Maybe I'll answer the door naked (or wearing sexy/skimpy lingerie) under a barely-closed short robe?  Or wearing a towel loosely wrapped around me ("I was stepping out of the shower when I heard you at the door!") and wait to see how you respond to "accidental" flashing before doing anything obviously naughty & needy.

Can you please show me what you're doing?  Oops, my robe fell open!  Or I dropped my towel!  Are you staring at my hot wet *****?  I can tell you're enjoying the show!  Would you like a better look?  You're so close, I bet you can smell me!  Do you want to taste me too?  (Men are so easy to seduce!)

Other women prefer to flirt using dirty innuendo & sexy looks & lingering touches to try to get the man to make the first move.  I like to flash & flirt & play with words too but with workers on a schedule quick (& rough?) is better and I'm already feeling ready-to-go from all the planning & plotting & prancing -- so I usually prefer the direct approach!  Men have trouble turning me down when I greet them nearly naked and have their **** out & growing hard in my hand before they know what's going on!

If the man leaves (most don't!) at least he has given us a little thrill (and sometimes more!!) before he goes.  Then we cross him off our list and just call someone else!!!  There are lots of names in the phone book and when calling a new place we always start by asking them to send someone good looking!!  That's a code many places already understand.

And the list I mentioned?  We have compiled a "Naughty Yellow Pages" with the names of men who have given us free service before and what they wanted in payment for various jobs!

We have our own little ExperienceProject going because each woman writes an anonymous review (Age & body type & **** size & personality & stamina & everything else!  Sometimes there are even photos!) telling the other members all the naughty stuff each time they get a good deal/*******/whatever.  I bet I'm not the only member who sometimes gets inspired to have extra work done around the house or yard which I don't really need just so I can get what she got!

We've also figured out some trends.  The guys who can give us the best deals or arrange for the most savings are the ones who are in business for themselves or the General Contractors.  I'm not sure why but carpet installers seem to be the horniest and plumbers are the kinkiest.

Many painters and wall-paper hangers will instantly *****-off and happily work naked if you say it's OK.  And they really appreciate getting to take a shower with you afterward.  So do fence guys and lawn or tree guys and roof guys, offering to get soapy with anyone who works up a sweat out in the hot sun will often close the deal!

Then there are the men who can work without anyone finding out because they have few or no materials to account for or they can buy whatever is needed at the local hardware store.  They can change the work order to something cheaper or just tell their boss that no one was home and then do the work for free and replace whatever they used up.  Those are the appliance repairmen, computer guys, electricians, handymen, men who clean / check / inspect / service stuff like air conditioning or furnaces, jump-starting a car, replacing broken glass and so on.

Single women like me and the married women who do this without their husband's knowledge have saved a LOT of money.  Some of us have put aside a fair amount over the years.  I know at least two women who never feel guilty because whenever they have enough they take their husband on a wild sex vacation!  And you know what?  Their men never ask where the money came from!  Of course, the men who tell their wives to perform for a discount know everything.  Some of them even know about The Club and use it to their advantage.  But that's a different message!

Some workmen are in more demand or know the score (word does get around in our area!) or have more at risk.  They bargain for anal sex or ******* or something kinky & wild like blindfolds or bondage or ice or feet or melted wax or outside or peeing or tickling or whipping.  Sometimes my friends & I will do all that if its a bigger job and they look & smell good to us and use condoms!  Or if they've gotten good reviews in the past.

And when a really big or expensive job comes along, well then we have to offer more!  One time was especially memorable.

A new member I had sponsored needed some extensive renovations done to her house and didn't want to take that much time off work so she asked if someone from The Club would be willing to supervise the workmen in her home during the day.  She didn't know yet that that's not how we do things in our sex club!  We are always challenging each other to have new adventures!!!

We thought the job would take about a week and it would be maybe eight to ten men in the work crew.  So I found three other women willing to commit with me to a week (and several alternates who said they were available for a day or so) and then we made her a counter offer!  We would do more than supervise, we will get her a huge discount!!!

She introduced us to the General Contractor (I will leave it to your imagination how THOSE negotiations went!) and he took the deal we hammered out to the men and the men said they would make it work.  It turned out to be four (or sometimes five) of us doing all sorts of stuff (anything they wanted!!!) to entertain a crew of over a dozen workmen (and not the same ones every day!!!!) for almost two weeks!!!!!

Our main condition (other than using condoms EVERY time) was that we would be completely anonymous -- the men wouldn't know our real names or where we lived, and there would be absolutely NO photos!

We have the same rule when giving a member's boyfriend or husband his favorite fantasy, such as "the birthday gift he always wanted" (a horny naked woman blindfolded & tied up on his bed!), or a horny babysitter, or a sexy cheerleader when the guys are coming over to watch football, or a just-this-once free pass, or a naughty french maid to spank & tickle, or a slutty next-door neighbor, or a hostess/******** on poker night, or a sex-slave-for-a-day, or a *********, or an uninhibited vacation partner!

Would YOU be happy to have your girlfriend or wife set up exciting adventures like that for you to experience with a new & willing woman each time?  Even knowing that every time you did, she was required to (eager to! ) give TWO performances of her own for another man?  Or another couple?  Or for several men?  Or a group of very naughty women?  Because trading forward more than we received is the game we play!

I could tell you dozens of hot stories about things women in The Club have done -- or I have done!  But what is important here is that we set up fair (& fun!) exchanges and keep the mystery woman's true identity a secret so there are no complications from either her man or ours.  Plus, we know the other women in The Club are safe!

The workers were contributing a lot of time for no pay so they came up with some conditions of their own.  They wanted a home-cooked meal for lunch plus snacks provided on the work site.  We had to be naked the whole time.  And at least one of us would always be tied up and available for use while being sexually stimulated & teased.

We agreed to everything without realizing that they expected us to find inventive ways to continually stimulate & tease to the brink of ****** whomever was tied up practically non-stop!!!!  It was going to be like running a ******* marathon!!!  (Actually more like a relay race because we were taking turns.)

To help with that we decided to bring in The Club's Deluxe Sybian with its "full assortment of accessories & attachments" as well as our own custom additions & modifications.  It was expensive but everyone had pitched in to purchase it and then we used it to initiate new members.  But of course we had to initiate each other first!

Plus we each contributed our favorite sex toys from home.  And I brought clamps & paddles & whips and other BDSM stuff (how I acquired my "interesting" toy collection is a story for another time).  I also set up my industrial-grade vacuum pump / air compressor.  I got it used from a High School science lab, then I added all sorts of rubber bands & suction cups & tubes just right for pumping up breasts & ******* and relentlessly sucking swollen nipples & sensitive clits!  That was fun because the other women had never experienced anything like that before!!!

Besides getting all the sex we could handle the men showed us several interesting new ways to use power tools on each other!!  The contents of her kitchen cabinets (extracts & oils & spices & Tabasco, oh my!) and her refrigerator/freezer also got explored & repurposed in very naughty & stimulating ways!

During the day each of us took turns being the woman/women who were tied up & teased/pleased while each of the men took turns with her/us!  And sometimes it was several of the men with just one of us!!

We were bound in lots of interesting positions -- spread-eagled or hogtied on a bed or couch, of course, but also standing in doorways, tied ***-up or *****-up on the kitchen table, bent over furniture, and even getting rinsed off with a garden hose while suspended from a tree in her yard upside down and legs wide open!!!  My personal favorite was when they tied two of us in 69 and then both of us were ****** or spanked or tickled or vibed while we made each other ***!!!!

The other women participated however the men wanted and were often told to play with the tied up woman/women or each other as the rest of the men watched & worked while waiting for their next turn with her/them.  But it was all four of us preparing hot food (maybe a casserole or chili or meatloaf or soup & sandwiches) and serving it to the men and cleaning up the Kitchen at lunchtime, which gave us a good break from the action.

The job took an extra day or two but it was an exciting & exhausting & fair trade which made everyone happy!

The woman who lived in the house only had to pay for the groceries & materials, all of the labor was free!  She had given the bid to her husband and then withdrawn the full amount from their joint bank account so she could keep whatever was left over.  All she had to do was to get everything looking normal before he got home, and he worked late.

After the job she treated us to a "recovery" weekend at a beauty & health spa.  But that wasn't why we helped her out -- now she owed the rest of us huge favors!  And she would be The Club's "*****" until someone else needed help with something.

There was also some extra fun we hadn't planned on:

The General Contractor showed up at the end of each workday and he always arrived fresh & horny when my friends & I were feeling well used -- which was fortunate because his **** was really, really big!!!

A Master Electrician and his just-out-of-High-School apprentice joined the crew for a day and they both wanted in on the deal.  The man liked to clamp & pinch & pull & twist nipples & clits.  The boy was inexperienced but enthusiastic with a nice **** that simply wouldn't stay down -- he was still a virgin in the beginning but really, really eager to learn everything we could teach him!  (He got called to do more electical work for us after that, on other occasions.)

And a city inspector walked in on us unexpectedly taking photos with his camera and then threatened to report everyone before demanding a turn with each of us as well!  He was a bully and wanted rough sex but that was fun too!  He claimed to have a vasectomy and refused to wear a condom and he even made us pose naked in the job-site photos he took for the official file!  (We told the work crew "No photos!" but I think some of them took some anyway on the sly.)

The other fun thing that happened was her husband found out what she was doing!  One day he had to drive back home to pick up something and was surprised to find naked women hosting a sex **** in his house!  After that he made his wife stay home from work and join us each day!  I told you that she was new, well she was also fairly new to sex -- she was having trouble pleasing her husband sexually and had joined The Club hoping to learn how to be a better lover.

The first morning he told her to ***** in front of the men and he spanked her while everyone watched until she agreed to destroy her own clothes by cutting them to shreds.  Then he tied her up himself and said everyone should **** her really hard!  She was popular with the men because she always started out hesitant & reluctant & shy and then put on a good show of protesting & resisting & struggling before ******* really really hard -- even she didn't know that she was a squirter!

She told us after that their sex life was better than ever because he made her be his "anything goes" naked sex slave for a month as payback.  And when the month was over?  She didn't want to stop so they never did!  (That gave the rest of us a lot to think about!!  Tee hee!!!)
NewChrissy NewChrissy 26-30, F 90 Responses Apr 25, 2010

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I work on computers and have traded services for services many times and still get requests for repeats. There's nothing like being seduced like that. The negotiation is my favorite part. Well almost favorite. ;)

you re one sexy hot hot lady an I do mean lady thanks

Thank you, but I'm not Lady Christina yet. I'm still Miss Chrissy. (I'm hoping it happens this year at Winter Solstice.)

that's cool any way you are so very hot dear I do like thanks

It's not cool. I'm being punished.

why are you being punished don't quite understand did not mean a thing at all sorry

I was supposed to become Lady Christina when I turned twenty-eight. That was over three years ago. (I got into trouble! But ask me privately if you want to know why.)

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wow again I think my **** is having a overload reading this again so nasty an hot an sexy an kinky hum just ******* love it thanks

wow my god what a story to bad I cant fix your lawn mower but doubt if you have one of them any way got my **** hard as hell woha nice sexy kinkny story thanks loved it just love nasty kikny stuff see now cant even spell my **** is so hard

Wow. I am a plumber by trade and although I have been flashed a few times by women I have never had an outright invite to bite. Would cost me though because all my hours are billable and the boss counts each and every penny.

Bite me! (Tee hee.)

Check your account settings, Dear. Your account is in anti-social prude mode. Until you fix it you won't have much fun on EP. (Everyone should check their account settings. The defaults EP gives you aren't what most people want.)

Think I got that fixed. Thanks.

Nope, it's still locked down, I can't let you in.

Okay. Pretty sure it is really fixed this time.

You fixed it! You might also consider sending a message to EPAllie complaining about it and asking EPSupport to stop doing this to new users.

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Damn thats so hot - I just came reading it

bloody awesome

To bad I don't live closer to you. I can do all sorts of home repairs, electrician , plumbing , hang ceiling fans, you name it.

What a way to start the day. Now I gotta go all day with a hard on while at work. BTW I work for a GC if you need work.

if your grass needs cutting or you want some flowers planted ,think we could work you out a deal you catch refuse :)

If you're into cycling and need a personal coach I'm sure we can come to an arrangement! ;)

I am into cycling, both bicycles & motorbikes! What is your fantasy about training me? (Tell me privately.)

You have a private message... and please add me :)

What a wonderful life you lead, all the sex you can handle, and work done free.
If your not careful, you will change the economy, from cash, to the barter system?

Boy made me want to give up nursing and get into home repair. I have a tool I don't get to use nearly as much as I would like.

I think Nurses are hot too.

WOW! that is awesome :D

Hmmmmmm, I am a building inspector and a red seal carpenter ... let me know when I can be of service!

Tell me about carpentering a BDSM spanking bench for me! Or a pillory & stocks for my back yard! Custom fit on site to my naked proportions. \"Measure twice, spank often.\"

Love it! I am often in woman's homes repairing the air conditioning and it is always a fantasy of mine. Short skirt. See thru top. Ect. I would love to work in the nude!

Then read my \"I was Wallpapered!\" story.

Send me a private message with your hottest fantasy about repairing my A/C. I\'ll be taking a shower or swimming in the pool to stay cool while you work. (Just don\'t open drawers in my bedroom or look on my computer or read my diary! You\'ll discover my BDSM sex toys and learn my naughtiest secrets & kinky turn-ons!!)

Maybe you need me to do some jobs around your house.

great stories...love your writing

women like you make me wanna help every girl around who needs it. never know when they can pay me like this!

Each of us could pay you like this, and some of us do! Tee hee.

Check out wifebarterclub.com very similar. If any ladies are in my area, feel free to think of me when you need work done.

excellent....i owe u many thanks.....erotic in so many ways

This is a great thing :)

Two weeks ago, my wife paid me the 140 dollars she borrowed the week before. She had overspent on her credit cards 40,000 dollars. As she is paying it back, sometimes she borrows to pay a bill then returns the cash.
Well, she wanted a new small carpet for our indoor porch. We went to a small Carpet Shop where we had purchased many items when we first moved in. She had on sandals, shorts and a button down, white, short top and no bra.
We took much time to make a selection. They were similar except for one which my wife liked. The salesman had left us alone in that warehouse of hanging carpets. The building has no air conditioning and is very hot in New York's July. The price on that carpet was $180.
My wife complained about the heat and she was sweating under her breasts. I told her to open her blouse and place the material under her **** so she won't have flesh to flesh contact and she would sweat less. She then complained that everyone could see her ****. I explained that this is nothing new as she had showed her **** since we started going out, thirty years ago.
I called William, the salesman. He is a Black African from Nigeria with a heavy French accent. He came over, my wife had placed the blouse under her **** and faced away from us pretending to continue looking. I showed him the carpet and her said, 'there are no discounts. The price is the cost of the item.'
I asked for a lower price again and he salesman told us the one carpet she selected was $180. "Honey, show him your discount card." She turned around and walked very close to him and he saw her D cup sized **** with big wine colored nipples. His mouth dropped open.
"Well, what is our discount, William?" she asked sweetly while smiling.
"Uh. Uh." He stammered. "One moment." He trotted to the office and grabbed the owner and the two of them returned. "This is her discount card, boss." William pointed at Honey's ****. The boss's eyes were opened wide.
"That carpet cost me $68. I'll let you have it for $100."
"I shall pay $80. Thats it! No more!" Honey insisted.
The boss said," Hmm, let me see..." He then reached out and took her *** in his hand, squeezed a little then let go. My wife did not flinch. "Thats nice! OK, $80 it is,"
William pulled the carpet down, then rolled it up and sealed with tape. I paid with 4 twenties. She put them back and closed the bottom button and William put the carpet in my car. I tipped him $2.
"Thank you. Thank you.." William said many times.
"You're right, I must get dragged kicking and screaming to a good time, EVERYTIME." Honey laughed.

WOW!!!

@timetoplaynow: I think it beats Angie's List too! (But I use both.)

Naughty Yellow Pages beats Yellow Pages all to hell!

My wife has used her 'discount' card many times. **** in public are enjoyed by most men. Let's talk 718 309 4367. I live on Long Island NY. Write to RonniePonyStrong@hotmail.com

Sincerely,
Ronnie

This all sounds very interesting. I don't work with my hands for a living, spending a lot of my time on a works PC. I do most jobs at home for myself; so expensive to get hired help. To save on washing all those oily, paint covered clothes I usually work nude.

Wow great story!! I'm a Carpenter / Ironworker who does some side jobs for people. Cash only. In your case I would trade for "services rendered" You are so Nasty...I love it. Add me?? Crowbar

Extremely Hot! I wish you were in my area.