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OKC and POF Are Fails!

My "About Me" section, if you will:

I start every single morning with a breakfast of iron. I eat nails and s/h/i/t razors. Then I go to my computer and delete every single piece of fan-mail I have received within the night without even bothering to read them. The amount of daily fan-mail is measured in googolplexes.

I currently work as the general manager of a multinational investment firm that deals mainly with funding research for neutron and fusion bombs et cetera. I have my own private jet and I use $100 bills as my toilet paper. Once I smoked a blunt wrapped in the original copy of Shakespeare's Macbeth.

I have many talents. I possess a superior analytic intelligence and my knowledge about everything and all is beyond anything ever known to mankind before me. Compared to me, Machiavelli was a minor player, merely a pawn. He was dynamite but I am a tactical nuke. In fact I know the meaning of life.

My father is Thor, the God of Thunder, and my mother is the Hive Queen from Aliens. That mentioned you might already know why I don't dig bullshit applications.

Because you want to know more about me you can read my biography. It's called "Beowulf".
deleted deleted 26-30 4 Responses Dec 26, 2012

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Love it haha

As a male user of online dating sites (still single). I have found this a very funny read.

-RenTharz

That...was...brilliant!

Hilarious