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Omg... Where Do I Start...

Strenght, courage, and wisdom.

That's all I can say. I was beyond suicidal for years. I was to the point that I was picking up glass off the street to try and cut myself with it. I was only 15. I cried. I cried. I cried and collapsed. My parents took me to the emergencey room (in Detroit). We had to go through metal detectors before we went in. I handed my father a handfull of razors crying. He had no idea. I knew how to play the system. That was more important to me at the time than getting help. I just wanted to get back to using various drugs. I though I could handle it all on my mind and on my own. As I get older it seems these feelings don't go away as we wish they would. I have been in and out of counceling for years, with meds. Try and try the natural way as long as you can. Talk to trusted people. cry endlessly. eat. don't eat. sleep all day or don't. It'd your choice. Do what makes you feel best, but don't hide from the facts. They will always come to greet you.
lilacoda lilacoda 31-35, F 1 Response Mar 28, 2011

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OH LILACODA! Some of us have such old souls, i truly believe this to be true.i see with burningeyes, i touch with burning hands! my eyes are constantly overting the brutality that is all around us ... yes people can be 'kind' but the kindness is just a ddrop in the ocean to the greed, anger, fear and brutality. I want to sleep,never to wake ... but the church even has a block on that! PERGATORY!!!! Surely that iswhere we are now! My next attempt will be successful - i do hope you find peace, kindness and perhaps the love of a good person to see you through the abyss...