Day 1 May 14, 2012
Please read this
This is a personal journal entry that i felt i should share with you.
Be kind for everyone is fighting a battle… I'm fight battle, more than a battle, I'm fight a ******* nuclear war. I'm just so mad at myself for not being kind. I was far from kind to myself last night and at the time i was so ready to die. I just cut deeper and deeper and didn't wanna stop. I was in the shower and the water was getting really bloody, i don't know what changed inside me but i got up and turned off the water and patched myself up and layed down and went to sleep(3:00 am) and didn't wake up until 2:00 pm the next day. I really wanted to die last night and i wasn't even scared. I was begging for death just wanting to be in a blissful painless sleep forever. But i know somewhere deep down inside me I'm worth living, I'm a beautiful person. I need to be kind to myself. It may seem really hard at that exact moment but when you learn to be kind to yourself i think it'll get a little easier.
So to all my lovlies just know no matter how hard it may seem and the only way you can think of to fix it is suicide think of this be kind for everyone is fighting a battle. Be kind to others and MOST IMPORTANTLY be kind to yourself. I love all of you. I know what its like to wanna die. Be kind.