I Love My Hubby

I love my husband we have been together through alot and we always are there for one another. For some reason we both seem to be so defensive about comments the other one might make and then we have this huge stupid argument over the smallest of things. We can know it's going to happen sometimes we feel it in our guts but we don't know how to stop it. I take some the things he says which would be better if left unsaid and blow them up . For example our 15 yrs old son had an attitude after his DAD (step-dad of 10 yrs.) but only Dad he has ever had. had ask him to do something i think it was helping bring in groceries. I mention to our son what he had appeared to have an attitude problem, and what was the prob; he just said Dad. So, I told him lose his attitude and we went on. I mentioned about 15 min. later to my hubby or should I say asked him what had happened .Of course nothing really happened just being a teen and his Dad told him to use his head. Well, I didn't make it clear to my husband that we ( my son and I ) had already had discussion about it. Hubby pops off to son WHY do you have an attitude? I went OFF ; Told my husband I already took care of it ,why did you mention it BLah BLah ETC ....  Figured my son would now be pissed at me for I don't know what . Which I don't care he would have gotten over it any way,  Here's the thing I totally lost it on my husband because he said anything to our son. I felt like when he said to him you weren't using your head which is something he says alot. It makes me feel like he saying your stupid and you don't think things out . When he is just being a typical teen and sometimes doesn't make the right choices. I was verbally abused and told i was stupid and a whole list of other things ; So we ended in this big argument over him always saying you're not using your head.  WE fight over the stupidest things. and I am not always the touchy one either. We get along great most of the time; But,Then there are times we wonder why do we stay together if we can't figure out how to fix this. 90% of the time it awesome then there is that 10 %   MAN !!!!!  Help !!! us
tigeress1970 tigeress1970
36-40, F
2 Responses Jul 17, 2007

yes, what we have here is a failure to communicate! Old line from a good movie. Ideal, it is, when you can do so with open minds and defenses down. I agree totally ....

What have you tried doing to fix matters? Have you done any reading about communication or conflict resolution?