Emotions are important, but nearly as important as the truth. If a friend says something to you and you get angry, there are two reasons for this. It was a hurtful comment, or you misunderstood. Obviously the emotion is there, but will the logic kick in in time for you to figure out what exactly the other person meant?

In my case, the logic usually comes first. This is good and bad. If someone says something sad, I don't automatically simpathizewith them, I analyze it. That sucks. Basically it's a handy dissorder for anyone who has a job where feelings and human interaction is not important. I only work well with people if they are happy, or want help with a problem. I am really bad at meeting them where they are and empathizing with them.

I figure I have the exact opposite problem as most people who feel and then think. But I try to do both. Usually I have to push myself to do it in the right order though.

ShopGirl ShopGirl
18-21, F
5 Responses Feb 26, 2009

Ah, interesting. I think usually I feel something (but don't express it) and then analyze it, and then decide how to express my emotions or how to feel based on that analysis.

I feel I know where this thread is coming from. I have struggled most of my adult life to suppress the logical side of my nature - being a man this means I have often shed those people who are not like me.<br />
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However, the more I focus on logic the more i realised that emotions are in fact logical., because if you think about it they help you to survive.<br />
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We've evolved by taking risks, which we percieve as being a consequence of an emotional drive to 'know more/ live better/ find something new'.<br />
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But consider the nature of your emotions - are they not logical, do they not help you to survive int he short term? Hunger - drives you to find food, Love - drives you to pass on your genetics, Happiness - rewards you for postive survival behaviours.<br />
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There is no seperation between logic and emotion really, they are simply one and the same in a different mask. Both are designed to help you survive, both work together by driving you to an action and giving you the sense to problem solve and survive.<br />
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It's just that people like us haven't usually realised that - I managed to recently and it has led to me being promoted at work. I'm now managing a large team and I understand every one of them, because I understand that all emotion is simply a consequence of a logical need.<br />
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The next time you ask yourself why you don't feel empathy, why your logical side kicks in - start asking the person questions (smile) and realise what they need. You can understand through a logical process what people feel. <br />
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But remember, your not different, just wiser.

I know how you feel. Yes, feel. You may be dissociating, but it is caused by an emotion.<br />
I wouldn't say I have a disorder: but I tend to withdraw to figure things out when they aren't working. But emotions are much more complicated than most other issues we may have to deal with. It sometimes takes a while to figure out what went wrong.<br />
Isolating oneself is detrimental, though and I feel the same need to work against closing off when there is tension. Fortunately, I can deal with more tension than I used to be able to.<br />
I think it is good to try to remain as calm as is possible under difficult situations, it prevents you from saying something you shouldn't.<br />
I think the problem comes when we try to lessen the emotional connection we have with others. Emotions are contagious. At least emotional intensity is. (It may be an equal yet opposite reaction) How not to get caught up because of the emotions of others, but still be engaged/have an attachment to them. (Of varying degrees, because of the type of relationship.)

My problem isn't trying to keep my cool. It's warming up. I have disociative disorder. Everytime there's the smallest bit of tention, I close off.

If people were purely emotional, then we would be mad; if people were purely logical, then we would only be robots with no hearts or souls. That said, I do think some people are more emotional/ sensitive/ empathetic than others, but that doesn't mean that they're necessarily better people. I would agree with you, that it's always better to analyze something that is said to us rather than just react to it. Try to keep your cool at all times...