All The Time

No matter how hard i tried to be perfect, the beating still came, stronger and stronger every time. My mother wasn't a sever as my father but beat me more frequently. If i had slashes on my arms from cutting she would tear those open. But as i got older i fought her back. My father, i couldn't do anything i would be so terrified i would freeze completely i would be screaming mentally but i wouldn't be able to move what so ever. especially when he would have me by my neck. it was those moments when i always thought i was going to die. feeling the pressure on my throat get tighter and tighter. My body finally moving trying to get free from the deaths grasp.
And then its over. im on my knees. gasping for air. my forehead  on the floor, as my father slams the door. showing me how he can take my life in an instant that he has that much power. That he is like a god.

these are my childhood memories.
Artemis17 Artemis17
18-21, F
5 Responses Aug 2, 2010

dont you just hate that suffocating feeling. dad used to hold his hand over my mouth so I could not breathe. The tears just streamed as I was going to die.<br />
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I never fought back. I guess i thought that would beat me more if i did. <br />
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The funny thing is that I was a very good kid. <br />
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The SOB is still alive and still bugging me...

im so glad you got through it you are a great contribution to this place personnally i havent been beaten by parents but i did get get my arm broken by a guard and got shot up between the toes by force by a druggie

It's good to see that even through all that, you're still standing, and I'm glad things are much better for you. =)

Haha, That was my mothers famous line actually. <br />
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Things now? I live with my eldest brother, who hates violence. So things are much better.

It happened to me to. The years go by but the memory still haunts me. Its affected me on several levels. I have very little self confidence and a bad anxity problem. The one good thing that came out of it is that I know how to treat my daughter much better than what I was. With love and understanding and gentleness. We probly wont ever forgive our parents because they dont deserve it, but at least our children will love us because we wouldnt ever put our kids though what we went through. Take the bad that happened to you and use it for the good. Stay strong and god bless.