Here's To That...

For many years I hid from my family and friends that I was a cutter. Most of you already know the many trials I endured as a child. (If not feel free to go ready my stories on rape, abuse, etc....) There is something about physical pain that for a moment erases the mental agonies.

At first it was hard, because it was kind of awkward for me, but as I started reaching my pre-teen years it became easier to do since by then Id been raped twice and abused. Anything to get rid of the mental pain if only for a little while.

I don't cut anymore. It took alot of help to get away from the self destruct button. There are times when I do have relaspes, but it hasnt happened in a very long time since Ive become a mother. I dont want to raise my children to believe its ok to do it. I want them to tell me when they are hurting, so that together we can deal with the problem.

For those of you who don't understand.....don't judge, because you never know what that person may have or still has going on in their life.
Blackbarbie1987 Blackbarbie1987
26-30, F
2 Responses Jan 23, 2013

Hello,Black Barbie 1987. How are you doing? Have you been okay lately?I am sorry to read that you felt so trapped and in pain that you would want to hurt yourself !I think that is really sad that you were so unhappy and i regret what has happened to you and hope ,also that the rest of your life goes better. You are really a pretty nice and worthwhile person and i am glad that you don't cut yourself any more.

i know how it is to deal with rape and stuff ive been being abused since the age of five and i was raped from age 10-14 and i to went to cutting as a release i still do cut to release pain and anger from my depression