Aneorexia NervosaI had aneorexia to the point that i weighed 7st at 6'tall and was emaciated, extremely physically ill, but much worse i was trapped in a calorie counting, self loathing hateful world of misery, and paranoia, truly walking alone in the depths of suffering and mental torture.
this was 5 yrs ago and i am now completely well and have left my illness behind for the most part.
i will always be haunted by the shadows of the ghost that used to rule me.
but now with work i can look away and feel safe.
eating disorder are horrendous but i am very glad i was fortunate enough to be able to suffer so greatly, as in that sadness and terrifying darkness i was truly alone and therefore got to know myself very well. pain is hard but to love life you must love ALL of its aspects pain is one of them, no more positive, significant or useful than any of the others but no less. to avoid pain, or anything else, is to avoid one of the mutually exclusive aspect of truly loving life.
i truly love life and being alive, which is something that for me always seemed an impossibility
thanks for reading