Those Feelings May Grow Old But Never Fade Away.

About eight, nine years ago I had a girlfriend that I thought would one day be my wife. She was nice, beautiful, smart, funny, and all this and that. Well because of family issues she had to move away. We kept in contact with snail mail and eventually email. Then one day I was sitting at home checking my email. I seen she sent me a email and I was all excited till I seen what she said. Even to this day I can quote it word for word. "Dear _____(Leaving that out) I am really glad you are doing so well in your writing classes. I hope you become a author one day. I really miss you. I moved back to Oklahoma last month. I live just south of _____ I found this wonderful guy, and he asked if I would marry him." Shocked, but wanting her to be happy I told her congratulations and asked if I could attend. I wanted to as least be there to take some photos and send her some copies of them. This was her reply. "I am sorry to do this, but I don't want to talk to you anymore. Forget I ever existed." It took me years to even get to the point where girls were living creatures to me again, and not just something to use and toss away. I know it sounds terrible of me to do something like that, but I was in a daze and I couldn't get out of it.

When I finally got out of it I used some contacts to find her. Come to find out her husband she got married to was very abusive and she now is unable to leave the marriage because of it. As sick and twisted as it sounds. I am glad. I am happy knowing the pain she caused me both mentally and physically is and will be inflected on her over and over. I honestly can go to bed at night knowing she is miserable, and I sleep perfectly. I know I should get some help for that, but it doesn't really change how I act or how I treat others. I just have this little twist part of me loving the fact she is in a living hell.
MalrakEhis MalrakEhis
18-21, M
3 Responses Nov 22, 2012

Don't take the end result like it was her decision. So much societal pressure to get married and 'happily ever after' bullshit her parents and/or even that abusive partner was probably the one who made her isolate from you. I say hate the man who made her do that against her will and the messed up society that praises marriage above all. I think the rage is right you are just directing it at the wrong person it should be at that man she married.

oh man , i know how bad u felt when this happened , well i had something like that too in my NOT FAR past tbh , its i think about half year ,, girl which i loved so strong . i would gave my life for her without a question ... but one day she just said something like " i think its time for us to separate " from outa nowhere .. was devastated ofc . and now im just afraid to fall in love again , not even looking at females any more , ... well m8 hope u found ur love ... wish you luck bro , and yeah i will never understand betrayal ... Never .is it so fun to make other people feel pain ? and make their lives harder than it is ? ... ,, Never

im sorry =( why do people suck so much?