If You Love Someone, Let Them Go, And They Come Back They're Not Yours.

Hello everyone, this is my very first share on here so forgive me if I ramble a little as I'm going thru a lot..

Anyone who reads my profile might question the part where I say every time something seems to go good in my life I get knocked off balance by something else that comes along and turns my world upside down.

To give everyone the full scope of what happened here understand that this woman who I for the sake of this thread will call Jen has always been regarded as the most beautiful woman to me in this entire world, she truly caught my heart the first time I saw her for me it was love at first sight, first seen her during my freshman year of High School, I only made 2 attempts to talk to her one at school and the next was outside where our paths had just happened to cross, at that time she was not interested and I was unable to catch her attention with either of the 2 attempts, shortly afterwards I found out she wouldn't talk to me because she was dating a bad apple in the city and he was very abusive to her and basically beat on her to the point where she was afraid to be caught talking to another guy. I couldn't do anything about it so I went on with my life graduated and around 2010 got a job at my 1st call center and little did I know my high school crush worked there too, so that made things a little more challenging trying to adjust to this new kind of work environment because anyone who has done that kind of job knows it's not easy..

Anyways, by this time I began working there my hairstyle had changed and I had lost some weight, a few months of working there word spread that she had a crush on me, I just want to say without jumping too far ahead that later on in as we got to know each other, I found out that she didn't remember me being interested in her from High school but I didn't let that effect us continuing what I had been waiting what felt like a lifetime for to happen.

During the time we worked together we didn't really spend time together outside of work, mainly just texting and fb convos here and there, it was when we both found jobs elsewhere when we finally began hanging out which was around 2011. I didn't have my own place but she had hers and although we were not officially dating at the time, we interacted as if we were, I stayed at her house at least 2 nights a week and she always had breakfast cooking by time I woke up even though I never asked she did it out of the kindness of her heart as did I like having flowers w/ assorted gifts & hand written love letters sent to her randomly but being she is a scorpio she warned me she had her ways and I saw them first hand a lot, very easy to word something the wrong way and end up on her bad side regardless of it being from me or her bestie.

Things didn't last long between us in 2011 because shortly after her birthday in November which I gave her a pretty big b-day gift but never the less I had asked her if she wanted to take things to the next level and make things official between us because there had been some occasions where not only she herself called me her boyfriend to other people but so did her bestie. She told me that she was and to give her a few days to sort some stuff out and we could, so I gave her a week and a half we carried on as normal during that time and once time had went by she didn't say anything else about us making it official so I casually brought it up during one of our conversations and lets just say this is where things went downhill--my month old pending relationship request I had sent her on fb was declined, if I tried to send her any sweet posts on her page they were immediately deleted, messages began to stop being returned, she later blocked me, calls were ignored, and texts were returned with un-lady like rhetoric which ultimately left me confused and like wtf happened? You gave me your word you were ready and this is what having patience gets me?

I figured she wasn't really ready because during this 1st go with me showing her my romantic and dedicated side that brought the tears of joy to her that I witnessed and sometimes was able to hear on the phone maybe it was all to overwhelming and she just didn't want to be hurt by what may have seemed to be too good to be true although I reassured her I was there by her side for the long run and would die before quitting on what we are building together. I let her go, as much as I didn't want to I gave into the mantra of this title...

Months went by w/o a word, we didn't even say Merry Xmas or Happy New Years to one another via txt or any means of communication whatsoever. Come late January of 2012 I left my current job moved 4 hrs away to Virginia where I began another relationship that lasted up until mid August. However it was in July I received a text from a # I didn't recognize but ended up finding out through playing along it was Jen, she apologized for letting things end the way they did and stated how remorseful she was that she hurt me, she asked me if it was too late for us and I told her it wasn't that I always believed in her and what we have together, I explained to her my situation and she explained hers to me a lot had changed she had moved but not far from previously and so had I.

Long story short I ultimately returned back to my original city to be with her for the 2nd time in late August, seeing her immediately the night I returned to town and from there her actions showed she was really about making it work this time. She was texting me good morning b4 her shift started, calling me on her lunch, and usually would beat me to being able to call her first when I got off work...when we spend time together we always find something to laugh and converse about..for different signs we have pretty much the same interests, we both don't really associate with too many people personally, I am a big romantic and always do my best to make her feel cherished and like she is my Queen, I know she likes my massages so I usually always give her a full body every night she was over before we would turn in for the night, also since I've been back I had been spoiling her as she does have some financial issues going on and she is also a single mom has a child by the abusive guy from high school, so I try to be there for her any way I can.

There were a lot of things that happened this 2nd time that lead me to believe everything she had told me before I moved back was true, we also did not get intimate until this time around either and the level of passion that was between us I find it hard to believe that out of nowhere she can just cut me off and act like we never had nothing.

One night after we made love we got into a pretty deep conversation about where we would like to see our relationship go and about relationships in general. We both reached the agreement that we were looking to start something long term, the 1st time around only her bestie and her mom knew me, but this time she introduced me to her brother and a couple of her cousins, she also told other members of her family good things about me while I was on the phone with her while she was around them a few times..

The way it ended 2 weeks ago was curiosity got the best of me as it seemed things were going too good to be true everything was fine and dandy until I asked her why she never talked about us or the things we went out and did on facebook and basically posted status updates that gave the impression she was still looking for love, I asked if she was ashamed of me or if she was afraid to basically let the world know about us out of fear of losing another option (someone on the side perhaps) she denied of course and told me not to worry and that she just didn't want everyone in her business, so I had a friend contact her on facebook a few days later to strike up a conversation and basically flirt with her..he called her sexy and she responded casually nothing out of the ordinary to suggest she was interested but then he asked her if she was looking for a man and she basically implied that her life doesn't revolve around looking for a man and that she didn't need one. Despite all of this he still continued and eventually got her # and later asked her if I would be okay that she just gave me her # and she of course had no idea he knew of me.

A couple hours later she texts me and tells me she is sorry for not being honest and wasting my time and that she is not into me, but yet this is the same person that stated she came back to me because she said I was so sweet and different from everyone else she had given her heart to in he past.

I'm not on here to brag but there was a big reason why we didn't make love and it isn't because she told me no, it was due to me wanting to put it off until the moment was truly right and I knew we were in love and once we reached that level I just find it hard to believe, she did some very intimate things I honestly wouldn't think a woman would do for a man they were not into, and the thing about Jen is she is a very high maintenance sophisticated woman so she doesn't invest her time in just anyone...been 2 weeks and of course I'm blocked on fb again, txts, calls and their voicemails all go unreturned and what makes it worse is it seems like deju vu again she's saying forget it around the same time of year as last time and what kills me is I really love this woman, and I know that she loves me too because what I neglected to mention is when she contacted me out of the blue this time in 2012 her # had changed and I had lost her old one so I wouldn't have been able to contact her even if I had wanted so she came back to me..just to abruptly leave again? I'm leaving out a lot but I feel I've typed enough for now..

Any female scorpios out there willing to share insight on this??
NobleMind NobleMind
22-25, M
2 Responses Dec 8, 2012

I'm not a female Scorpio but I did date a Scorpio male for this past year and reading your story it's like I'm reading my own. Everything she did to you is exactly what he did to me. We met in January of 2012 and things went pretty fast between us. I met his grandparents in February and his mom in April. Everything was perfect but hen randomly outta no where he would break up with me. Tell me tht e was scared, not used to it, that I was too good to be true,that I was too young for him (I'm 22 he's 26 not much of a difference in my opinion) that he wasn't sure of he felt the same for me anymore so then it would begin.: the number change the blocking on Facebook and not talking to me for months at the most. He would always come back tho and he's still here. Just recently we decided to move in together he got is a place for us and my daughter (had her when I was 18) but when it came down to the day he moved in by himself and left me out of it. We stopped talking again for 2 weeks he again told me he didn't love me and to leave him alone, so I did and out of spite and anger and sadness I slept with one of his friends... I told him about it when he came back AGAIN and he forgave me said he loved me and said that I Hirt Jim but is now willing to make it work. I know I'm setting my self up for failure yet I can't say no.

So that's my story - I hope things get better for us

My best female friend is a scorpio, we are pretty much the same. I think the reason she contacted you was that she was feeling lonely. Scorpios never forget. She knew you were a perfect man, caring, loving but I guess she was not madly in love. I guess she just wanted love in her life but maybe this just didn't feel quite right for her. I think you did everything right, beyond that. I think she is confused with herself, she may love you, but she doesn't know exactly what she wants from life. (I'm in this situation right now and I act pretty much the same as this girl, except for I love this man and he doesnt love me that much but just wants me back. I'm confused: blocking then talking.)
I think it's about her, she is confused. She is not sure. You did everything perfectly.

I'm thinking your right on everything she definitely is confused with herself and doesn't seem to know exactly what she wants from life, when we first were trying to get to know each other she was in College and although she is not actively enrolled at this current moment I do know she was serious about Business Administration and shared with me this great idea she had that I honestly believe could be successful if she stays focused, it definitely could become a reality. Nowadays though if I were to ask her about it she'd probably be like "ughh I'm not really worrying about that right now" and another example is one week her focus is saving her $ on buying a motorcycle, next week if you ask her about if she is still wanting it she is like no and is now infatuated with a suv...or something else..so I guess I should have seen this as a sign that constant changes in material and career wants would eventually spill over into our relationship...and with the guy that wants you back have you tried distancing yourself to see if he is willing to put action to those words? Anyone can say they want you back, I know for me in situations like that when we're apart that I want that person back even more the more they distance. I dunno why but it's just like that lol...

Yes, I tried and he gave up easily. I really think you are worth someone better. I mean it. I mean it's not that she is bad but it's just because she is not that in love