Quite My Job With No Notice And Now I Want It Back...

A little over a year ago I moved across country back to where I grew up in a small city. I was going through a divorce and I was a mess. I took the first job I applied at. Which was a huge mistake because I wasn't really ready to work. I was used to working for myself as a contractor where I was living and making good money. This job paid minimum wage plus commission. But what I didn't know at the time was that was really good money for the area. I got offered another job that was subcontracting and even more money, got to make my own hours, and I scooped it up and quit the other job soon after. The way I quit was horrible. I was scheduled to work one day and I called in late but I really didn't want to go in and then I ended up calling and quitting over the phone. My boss was so nice too. She asked if there was anything she could do to make me stay. I think about it now and I just hate myself so much. I acted like a total jerk. I would give anything to have that job back now. The subcontracting job fell through and I've been working a crappy job since. That job was in my field and it paid good. I worked so hard before I moved back home and now it was for nothing. I want to write a letter of apology but I don't know if that will do anything. Even if it doesn't get me my job back do you think it will give me closure? I just wasn't myself when I up and quit like that. I'm the type of person people are glad to have as an employee. My employers have pushed to keep me in the past and past employers have given me referrals when I was a contractor because they liked me. It was a huge, selfish mistake and I wish I could have them understand. I know the other employees would probably be mad at me too. But I believe everyone deserves a second chance.
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daisynukem daisynukem
26-30
2 Responses May 13, 2012

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Write an apology? Absolutely. I used to be a mess as well and a top grade ******* to boot. Here is what happened when I apologised to a girl that had every right to tell me to f-off.<br />
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Me.<br />
"I'll try and keep this short, so here goes.<br />
<br />
I feel I owe you an apology, it's been on my mind for a while and believe me, if dropping you an anonymous message with just 2 words would make me feel any better I would do it - but I've finally gotten around to doing this.<br />
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What I want to say is, you were right. I am ignorant. I think I made you feel ignored, that I hated you and that you weren't good enough and all I can say is, I'm Sorry I did that to you.<br />
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<br />
So Long."<br />
<br />
Her.<br />
WTF??<br />
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3 months later. Her.<br />
Hello mikey! I was just reading my mails there and seen one from you. I'm a bit confused, can you explain the mail you sent a few months ago. Hope everythings okay with you? Fancy grabbin a beer some time? Maybe some macaroni? Xxx<br />
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Me.<br />
'Suppose you could say I was sleepwalking through the past few yrs. Snapped out of it on Jan 5th, and saw my life was quickly going nowhere. 1st thing that hit me was regret, felt like I had to make amends with a few ppl and move on. Beer and macaroni? Maybe I'll throw 1/4 of a bud in the sauce while I'm at it [:P] Well, I'm done here. I've done what I set out to do and there's not much I can say beyond that.<br />
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Her.<br />
Hey mikey, ur last message really inspired me! So I think I owe u an apology also! I know exactly how u feel wen u say uv been sleepwalking! For I to have slept through my whole life not knowing how important u r to me! I really do think we should get together and have that macaroni and beer!<br />
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Me.<br />
Wish I could, but I'm unemployed. Some other time. Dankeschöne<br />
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If you have made it this far down the page, then congratulations. I want to round this off by saying the first reaction you may get is shock (yeah like the one above and I thought the conversation was over, until I got a message back 3 months later). If you feel ignored, don't force the issue, by apologising then you have done all you can at this point.<br />
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Until you get this over with, it will consume you, when you send the e-mail/letter you will feel a sudden pang of embarrassment, a desire to claw it back from the interwebs or the postbox, and even though it will still occupy your mind after having sent the apology, the feeling will become less all-consuming as time goes by and you will be able to focus on what you have in front of you, your life.<br />
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Ofcourse, if everything goes the way you want it to, things may start moving quickly in your life again.<br />
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And before I sign off, it took me 9 months to write that initial message, but having a warm shower before typing it up made me feel much more at ease.<br />
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Good luck.