Why Would My Hubby Push So Hard Towards Envolving Others Into Our Bed?

I am trying to understand why my hubby wants to badly to fantasize about another man with me or vise versa but claims it is not about the actuality of it happening. Even though he is the type that is fine with us becoming swingers if I want that and if that excites me. Which I have made so clear so many times that it is not ok with me. He tries so hard to convince me that it is not about the physical part of it and that no matter what we may do with others should never affect the strong foundation. This is what confuses me. So if he does not actually want this physical part as the end result then what is he trying so hard to convince me of?

He thought it would excite me by bringing one of his ex girlfriends panties home for me. It made me not trust him, then he thought it would excite me if he called this same ex girlfriend on the phone to have her tell me what she wanted me to do to him. That made me actually sick inside and he swore he would not go there again. The last straw was recently when he put up a profile online and told me that he met a girl went to her house and this was all about exciting me and that he did not do this for himself? He claims his did not do the deed but played with her all the while he was only thinking of me.

He has been told by me over and over that I can not handle it. He claims we never have to go there but he always does. I finally left him although he keeps calling and emailing me and I continue to ignore him because I can not deal with his crazy disrectful behavior anymore. Why has he done this? I can not ever go back to this and I know I want a divorce. So why does he keep pestering me? I can not give him an open relationship so he needs to find someone who will. He left a message calling me a B*** and that he does not deserve this from me? What? Can someone please explain this to me?

hurtgirl hurtgirl
46-50, F
Mar 11, 2010