Okay, here goes. This is still pretty flesh so bare with me.
I had been seeing a girl for about a year, i dont usually make this judgment so early, but i knew she was the one, we never fought, we had everything in common, and our feelings for one another where mutual we had fun all the time and never got sick of each other even after spending whole weeks together day in day out.
When i say we never fought, i litteraly mean never had a fight, and it didnt seem like we where going to. Sure we said some stuff that temporarly hurt each others feelings, but by accident, and it was always quickly resolved.
So everything was fine, well better than fine life was awesome, last i knew she was happy i was happy.
Then one day bam, she comes over and is acting weird, i probe her for questions and she tells me she is having doubts about our relation ship. When i asked her not to be rash and break up with me, she said its what has to be done.
This took me by suprise and it hurt a lot, there was no convincing her otherwise, she was set on her desicion, but i wasnt entirly convinced by her story, so i probed more for a real answer but i never got one in turn she was stuck on her reason. this break up turned bitter real quick, she got upset that i was upset, and didnt talk to me for 2 days and was almost angry at me for being in love with her.
Then the other day, i finally got a message from her and we decided to hang out, we went and saw a movie, the next thing i know she kissed me, and kept kissing me. It seemed that she had set her priorities right and we where going to work it out. She told me she couldnt stay away and really truely loved me. But i was still skeptical and scared, i didnt want to be hurt again. so there we where lying on my bed just talking.
She said to me, that if we are going to make this work she has to come clean with something, she told me she cheated on me.
I was devistated, she also told me that the whole break up reason was just a cover up, she was taking the easy way out. But she told me because she wants to work it out and still be together.
She had kissed one of her good friends when she was drunk, and she felt bad so she left me so she didnt have to tell me and so i wouldnt hurt, but i was hurting.
we talked about what had happend, i was still devistated i was in shock i couldnt even muster an emotion, probably because my emotions where already depleated. well she went home the next day and i spent all day and night contemplating what to do next, forgive her and take her word that it was a once in a lifetime mistake and she wont hurt me again. or to go with the saying once a cheater always a cheater quote and leave her.
There was a lot on the line, i told her i would be insecure, i wouldnt be able to trust her for a while and she accepted these terms.
Well just this morning i was talking to her, and i assumed the way she would feel is she would go to hell and back for my forgivenes, but the way she was talking was like she didnt care of the outcome, that it was on my shoulders to make up what happens next.
So i asked her if she even wants to be forgiven, and after some discussion she flat out tells me that she doesnt want the relationship at all, and stuck with her origional excuse of she has doubts about our relationship.
So we are right back at the start, She broke up with me, got back with me, admited to cheating, then called the quits for what i think is the final time.
Im so lost, i dont know what to do. We where going to move in together when she cheated on me, which caused her to back out, and it spiraled down from there. i love this girl but she just doesnt love me back.
This had all happened is 1 week.