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To Want A Baby Ones Youve Llost One

ok so my husband has a small son from a previous relationship. we dated for one year, got engaged. Then married 8 months later. We will have been together for 2 years this december of 09. The problem is as follows, eventhough some may say 2 years is not enough time to have a baby i have always been ready to start a family. I was never a ''cluby party' girl. And now that i have found the right person even more so. The sad part of this story is i DESPERATELY craved a little baby of my own and may of this year i had gotten pregnant by accident. After 3 months i found out my baby had cystic hygroma and terminated the pregnancy.  (there were 2 tumors in with the baby and it was basically 100% chance the baby would come with health problems and not live). It was the most awful thing i had to do and i was only 3 weeks away from my wedding. STRESS! In the first drawer of my night table i keep my baby books, the pregnancy test i had taken and a few other ,,,i thought would be treasured memories.  he says we should have time to be married because he has never been this happy with a significant other. I dont know how reliable his promses are as he had promised we would try after marriage since i had lost the baby and because i wanted one so bad. to make matters worse can you believe 4 of our closest couple friends are pregnant. I am happy for them but it is a constant reminder everytime i see them. Everytime i go anywhere and see a baby i smile....and take a few deep breaths.  every time.

BabyBlues4750 BabyBlues4750 22-25, F 2 Responses Oct 16, 2009

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I feel the same way seeing another woman happy with a baby is the most depressing thing in the world, my boyfriend seems to only want one if it's not planned I feel sick with depression over it

Hi, Im so sorry x x What you are feeling now is deep greif, councelling may help although your baby was never born you loved him/her. Dont be ashamed to be upset you have lost a child, having another baby so soon probably isnt the answer to all this hurt you are feeling you need to deal with this first. There is time for a baby and your husband doesnt sound like he doesnt want a baby just not yet.