Waiting... Planning... Too Many Decisions...

I'm 23 years old.  I will be graduating from college next spring.  Next September (2008), I will be getting married.  Unfortunately, I want to be an actress.  I love singing and acting and theatre; it's what my major is in college.  However, it puts a huge cramp in the "starting a family" schedule.  My fiance is an electrician who is currently doing his apprenticeship in our hometown.  After I graduate next spring, he will still have two (three?) years left before we can move to Chicago so that I can really pursue my career.  We can't decide whether it would be better to try for a baby as soon as we get married (something that we're not sure if we can afford), or if it would be better to wait until we are more settled and financially stable.  I'm mostly concerned about waiting because it took my mother a long time to get pregnant.  She had me 6 years after she got married, when she was 30, and my sister when she was 36.  They started trying as soon as they got married and then again 2 years after they had me and both times it took quite a long time.  It makes me scared to wait because I want to have at least two kids and I feel like that won't happen if I wait too long.
Chanteuse1984 Chanteuse1984
26-30, F
3 Responses Jun 6, 2007

Im in the same boat with my husband hes getting ready to deploy again and all of our friends have kids and he sees how much i love kids and i know he wants babies too but i would like to be pregnant before he leaves but at the same time he and i dont want him to miss anything so its really hard to make a choice, i was in a relationship prior for three years with a child involved and not having him in my daily life is so hard and makes me want one of our own just that much more, my mom had a hard time getting pregnant also so i want to start trying young obviously that way if it does unfortunatly take me awhile to get pregnant i wont be too old to have more then two children

It's been a while... I'm curious to know what you decided.

I don't know if it is heritable. I would say that you are still young but you can never know how much time it will take. My mother became easy pregnant. It seems that I am not like her. I was 25 when we married. We wanted to wait some years. Last year we decided to start the 'project'. Now I am 28 and I say that maybe we should have started it at the beginning. The thing is that my husband said too that we should be financially grounded. Three years are gone and we still can't say it. Once I heard it: When God gives a lambkin, he gives a pasture as well.