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Why?er

 I have spent my life wishing for someone to love me. I have always thought a boyfriend would solve my problems. "this will be the year lauren" my mom kept telling me, what I kept telling myself. But years have gone by and I am almost 17 and never really even been on a second date with anyone. I wonder to myself why? What is wrong with me? I am pretty, right...........? That is what bothers me. Is guys only look at looks. The whole DAMN world only looks at looks. Think about it, you walk down the street and a cute guy whistles at you, what if an ugly one does. We judge so eaisly. I just want someone to look at my mind. Because I am starting to belive I am not pretty, I am not good enough, I just think that looks are all that matters, and I am turning into one of those people I hate. Who only judge looks. I cry myself to sleep sometimes just WISHING I was prettyer, sexier, someone who could actually get a boyfriend. I want someone so badly!  I try to tell myself there IS someone out there! But I feel I will never find him...

scifichic scifichic 16-17, F May 7, 2009

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