The Clocks Tickin Faster Then I Wish It Would...

As far back as I can remember I always knew I wanted to be a daddy and have a nice big happy family. I can even remember thinking that when I was 4 years old and I realized how happy my dad was making us happy. So, growing up I would fantasize about my future family lol I figured some time in my early 20's I would be married and with kids already. Alas, I'm in my mid 20's now, just had a miscarriage and am unmarried without children. I am however, engaged and I do thank god for blessing me with my wonderful fiancé. Yet, she is in no rush at all to have kids and wants to wait quite a while. I on the other hand want to settle down and start on our family. I understand she enjoys her partying and everything but in a couple of years she's going to be thirty already I just think there comes a time to hop out of the fast lane and realize we aren't teenagers anymore... And get on with our adult lives i.e. family, carreer and start saving for our future (if possable). I don't want to wait forever and become one of those old man dads. I want to be a somewhat youthful dad. I want to be able to play ball with my kids, take them hiking, biking or whatever it is they get into. I want to be an active dad not an old man saying, sorry son you'll have to go without me I'm tired and my back is acting up again... I know it's not anything I can rush on her; but, I was willing to make some HUGE sacrifices for her and deal with a lot of her issues that most people would consider way too much to handle. I just wish she might return the favor. I'm not asking her to be a stay at home mom and forget about her career. Just slow down her life style and consider being sober long enough to have a child. I don't know, maybe I have no right to ask her to modify her life style, but I do feel somewhat entitled to my dreams, considering I have been willing to sacrifice A LOT in order for her to have hers. But that's all another story...
diamondintherough85 diamondintherough85
22-25, M
Aug 9, 2010