Complicated

I met someone 5years ago, he really insists to be with me,so I fell in love . Three years later we get married and a baby . From the beginning he was a such a liar and never admit his lies. He is not a bad bad guy but you know when someone you really love start to do bad things on you , how much you feeling hurt. And many times he hurts me I start to have a very bad attitude like swearing at him lots ,and kinds of bad thing.........
After birth in 2011 , I start to change , I forget everything he did and loving him as before , however it makes him worse , and the worst things that i cannot support is "the verbal abuse" on me each day, MR doesn't have words limit anymore ( i accept and still apologize for what i said before, and explained him that we must both forget the past and forgive each other)but his answer was so negative, I couldn't make it,if someone is harassing you everyday with" you are nothing without me"," where is your diploma", ..... the final word was "fucken *****"
My ex was still contacting me so i was trying to find comfort with him , and his last word became reality !yes I cheated , I donnot love this one just that he helps me away from stress , I really regret what i do and want to stop it ( i love my daughter more than anything in the word, and I don't want her to get hurts and have separated family) also i am still in love with my husband, the problem now is that the other man is really in love with me and I don't know how to stop it. I want to give a chance to my marriage. what can you advise me?
PS: I'm a french speaker and sorry for my mistake.
An Ep User An EP User
Jan 20, 2013