I Get Looked Down On By The Baby Mama

I'm 25, divorced, and didn't have kids in the relationship because I wanted to wait until I had finished all of my professional education and have financial strength.

Well, now I've really gotten myself in trouble because I fell in love with a guy who has four children from two women. One was a on-again-off-again girlfriend (now, a CRAZY...CRAZY baby mama) and one who was nothing more than an easy lay. See, my man used to be an animal and started to change when he joined his fraternity, met me, and started to develop a relationship with God.

Now here we are a year after we started talking, 8 months after officially starting to date, and I'm heading to law school this fall. We want to be together for the long haul, but we know there will be no kids anywhere in the near future for us. We want me to finish law school, have him finish his masters, and get married first. Basically, we want to do it "right"...

But here's the problem, the crazy baby mama (the other one knows her place and never cared about him, just wanted the kids) lords over me the fact that she's not going anywhere because she's the mother of his child. I can handle her mouth, but I'm just so tired of the passive aggressive digs at me. She acts as if she is superior to me because she PURPOSELY got knocked up by a guy who TOLD HER he didn't want to have any kids with her (that's a whole other story).

I guess my point in saying all of this is that I really just need to get it out and secondly, that I don't know how to deal with her vindiciveness, manipulation, and superiority complex. I'm just trying to live a good life and one day have a family of my own, but this woman makes me want to scream... plus we live in what I swear is the single un-wed mother capital of the world (I won't say where)... most of the women here my age have kids and no relationship, no education, no NOTHING, but think that having given birth makes them more of a woman and a "better" woman than me.

Any advice from people who have been there? I don't know how long I can deal with this but I'm definitely in love with my man and want a future with him... on the "right" terms.
elleri elleri
1 Response May 12, 2012

he want to take your mind from kids thats all and your instinct do not lies to you /hapen to me and my wife now i regret been nice i dont have kids