It sucks not to be confident. Worrying about how you look and how other people see you is almost crippling to me. I want to be able to walk out of my house and feel comfortable in my own skin. I'm very over weight, decent height, short hair and an odd face (not that ugly not pretty). I pretend to have confidence when I go out with my friends but inside I feel like exploding. I really want to get over this because it keeping me from living my life and being happy.
LovelyLady333 LovelyLady333
26-30, F
5 Responses Aug 26, 2014

You gotta realize a fee things... No one is completely happy with their body... No one is perfect- in every way. It's like we all have strengths... Find yours and focus on them and let your weaknesses be ok with you a work in progress!!!

Oh yeah. That fear, that nervousness that makes you want to stay home, not see anyone. That anger and self hate making you question everything you do say, how you look.

I've had similar issues and in my experience, two things help a lot. I take about 10 to 30 minutes a day in "meditation". Nothing spiritual or wacky about it, just a few minutes concentrating on nothing, sound of breathing (it can even be music as long as it has no lyrics - go for anything from classical to trance, just no thoughts conveyed). It's an island of peace that helps me calm down. When you're calmer, you judge yourself less, everything is easier.

The other trick, exercise. And I'm not saying that so that you work yourself out trying to gain the perfect body. I'm a dude and god knows I've never had abs and pecs and probably never will. But tiring myself brings on the endorphines and boy do they make you feel good. Feeling tired and good.

Those two things don't change your confidence in yourself, but they'll make you feel good now and then. And feeling good about yourself will little by little help your overall confidence. Worked for me. Hope you find your way.

I have the same problem. My self - confidence closes me off. When I start thinking of what other people are thinking I shut myself of with body language. Then it hit me, they might not be thinking..."why is that girl wearing that dress, she looks awful?" ... but what they're really thinking is... "why is that girl shooting me dirty looks, she's so un-happy! ". We really are our own worst enemies, I think as women we need to look at each other as sisters and care about ourselves; love ourselves and let go.

I hear you loud and clear my advice take it one step at a time. First give yourself a reason to feel good about your body and dress up (no chickening out on this one) no matter if it's plain face or a trip to the salon. You owe yourself that much.

From a fellow no confidence woman, trust me it help just started taking these steps and made a world of a difference.

Please read my post about women, self-image and confidence.

Be yourself, comfortable with yourself and remember, people who mind don't matter and people who matter don't mind.