I Told Them And Don't Regret It

I had confided in my sister years ago when she found I had wore some of her clothes and she encouraged me to tell my parents as she said she would support me if there was a fall out.

A few years later I plucked up courage and told them one evening when we were all sat at dinner, my sister was there with her husband and sat and held my hand all the way through the talk and was brilliant about it. My mother said she knew there was something going on but couldn't pinpoint what I was doing but she said if I was happy then she would support me with whatever I wanted to do with my life as long as I wasn't doing drugs and ruining my life she could live with that. My dad sat there and after I had spoken he got up and left which upset me but I had expected a reaction like that from him, he later told me he was stunned and didn't want to have a big argument as even though he doesn't agree with my choice of lifestyle he doesn't want to have any problems between us. My brother however was totally against what I said and told me so in no uncertain terms never to speak to him again and true to his word we haven't spoke since which isn't what I wanted to happen but I have to accept it and get on with my life.

All in all I am so glad I told them as it means I don't have to hide a secret life from my family and although they might not understand they accept me for who I am.

Jennianne Jennianne
41-45, T
3 Responses Feb 10, 2010

I understand your dad's problem,don't agree,but understand. Fathers accept children that appear as male as a genetic copy of themselves. Not sure,but I think this also applies with mom and girls. I do know that parents often want children to live out the life that THEY hoped to have. But each person even with genetic links is special in their own way. We cannot and should not force our offspring to be anything other than their true selves. It is destructive. Your mom was correct,if you are not doing unlawful activities,NO PROBLEM. We cannot make any person into someone WE want them to be. Glad you had at least some support. Sorry about your brother,but it was HIS choice. A poor one,but HIS. Sadly society finds often petty things to find fault with. The best of luck to you in your journey. Also take heart in the fact, that most if not all who contributed to society were ALSO outside the "accepted" realm.

That is a rough step but necessary. Maybe your brother will come around, but it will take time. I really admire your courage... I love to see people following their bliss. Its not an easy path, but its the only path that let's us be complete.<br />
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When I told my wife about me it (early on when dating) it was nerve wracking... but she has accepted me for me and embraces my fem side. Its great to share with her and not hide. My family knows too, so I don't have to hide around them either.<br />
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Thanks for sharing this Jennianne.<br />
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A few years back I had the experience of telling some members of my family. It wasn't easy. They were OKish with it, but basically don't want to know.<br />
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Sorry about your brother.<br />
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Claire xxxx