Domination/submission

I've always been one of those girls that leaves people wondering, even myself at times. Just in the recent year I've experienced a sexual awakening that has openned new doors for me. This caused problems at first in my husband and my relationship due to me looking elsewhere to be fulfilled, we have worked beyond those problems and I am now in my current state. I am extremely turned on by the thought of him dominating me, this sounds completely out of character for me since I cannot stand the thought of him having control of me. However, I love anything out of the ordinary when it comes to sex, and life in general, and I've been recently reading stories on dominate/submissive relationships, I even rented the movie the secretery, which I recommend, lol. Dominating me shouldn't be a problem for my hubby, because it seems that he's been trying to do that for the past fifteen years to no avail. But he's lost on this, and due to the fact that I'm not quite sure about it all either, I don't know how to show him, teach him or whatever without becoming the dominate myself, which I do not care to do. It turns me on to think about him tying me up and leaving me there for a few as I moan for him to please me, and that is just one thing that has peaked my interest on this newfound sexual subject. If anyone has any suggestions I would love to hear them!
secrets secrets
31-35, F
5 Responses Dec 16, 2006

Pick up a erotic book of bondage and read stories to him.show him how wet it makes you. but some people don't get into it so be prepared

As I am sure you know, the sub is the one with the real control. It is about being able to let your mind go that actually you find your true self. My wife and I have been on this same path for years. We have had our fair share of ups and downs. To this day the one thing that has absolutely been the life saver is Communication, Communication and even more Communication. It took my wife 9+ years to let me know who she truly is.<br />
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She is a submissive by nature and she had fought it all her life. But once we were able to talk openly and honestly about it she was able to let go and submit. It has opened so many doors in our marriage and our friendship with each other. The key in any happy marriage is Communication. So set some time aside with your husband and hopefully you guys are to the point that you can communicate freely with each other. <br />
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There are many forms of Domination and submission. Only you and your husband know what your seeking. It may just be sexual submission or it may be part time submission. Full time submission can happen but most of our experience has been part time as well as full time sexual submission. We believe that each person has their own ideas and expectations and it is best to talk about them, make your limits known and no matter what you don't cross those lines for anybody but yourself. We wish you the best of luck and hope that any information is used just for idea and not practice. Your the one in control even though you desire submission.

<p>I agree 100% with the above. Its very erotic for me when my wife dominates, or even spankes, me in the bedroom. The we have great sex!</p>

I am not now in a BDSM relationship although I have had some experience as a dominate male in the past. The power exchange dynamic is weird to say the least because in the end it is the sub who is in control. That is, although she's handing power over to her dom, she's given him her trust and he therefore becomes trustworthy. A good dom knows this, and carefully manages the power dynamic over the sub.<br />
It is a delicate dance, a careful path to follow . . .

still need some adive on this?