Need Some Advice On How To Procede:

I'm also interested in trying this, but have not approached my wife of 25 years yet. With two teens in the house, it's difficult to find time let alone be noisy or vigorous in our sex life. However, I spotted a sale a year or so ago on a harness with black nylon straps, and a "base" to hold the thin purple untextured ***** in. I have not shown it to her, but I have removed the ***** and tried it on her first as a sex toy (it was fair for her, but smaller than the one we normally use for her) and then for me one day during solo sex. It was adequate, in that it was not too large for me. But otherwise, It didn't do much for me. I cleaned it up.

My question is two fold: First, what is the appeal for a man...that is, what sensations should he expect to receive from a strap-on...and in what position should you two be?
Second, since my wife is somewhat heavyset, I suspect the straps will be close to their extreme limit when tightened down. Any suggestions on where and how it should be positioned on her body?
And finally, how do you suggest that I broach this topic to her? She's not opposed to trying some things, but more frequently comes down on the conservative white bread/vanilla side of sex... (prefers "natural" sex instead of "kink"), but when very aroused, will explore.   Suggestions?
studfinder studfinder
56-60, M
1 Response May 24, 2012

OK, so I asked her to use a strap on me tonight, and after she got her ******, I produced the harness and small purple ***** that sits in it, and she donned it. Didn't have too much trouble positioning it, but she said it felt a bit weird. It was probably a mistake on my part, but I produced some anal lube that stung a little, and laid forward doggie style waiting for her to penetrate me. She did, awkwardly, and we needed more lube immediately. But the time she did peg me, the enthusiasm was waning. After making some thrusts and slipping out a couple of times, she abandoned it. It was then that I remembered someone's suggestion to lay back and let her do me missionary style, but she wouldn't have any of it. She did remove the purple ***** and hand inserted it into me, but I never felt it on my prostate. I could feel the warmth coming out as she withdrew it, but other than that, it wasn't getting me off, and her other hand wasn't arousing my ****.<br />
After about two hours of playing, and attempting all sorts of other positions, hand job, bj, vibrator, sucking, nibble, more vibrator, I've finally given up and let her fall asleep in our bed nude under a sheet. I AM JUST NOT AROUSED. NOTHING IS GETTING ME OFF.<br />
The kids are away for the evening, and we have the house to ourselves, and nothing. Damn.<br />
I did correct her after twice she applied the vibrators to the dorsal side of the penis, that the most sensitive surface point is the other side. She apologized and said I could do it myself, that she had gotten confused and that her arm is aching, etc. I guess I'm just numbed out. I thought she knew what she was doing.<br />
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I asked her if she'd like to sleep and let me jump her sometime in the night when my libedo returns. She said she didn't know. I take that as a "no" or "lets see how I feel then."<br />
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At least one good thing came of this. Before we started, we put our window air conditioner in the bedroom on the second 90 degree day in our town. Whew! At least it's tolerable.<br />
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I just wish something would arouse me. At age 56, I'm too young to go without sex.