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I Really Need To Let Him Go

Hey everyone, im new to this site. im really stuck in a rut Ive been going out with a guy for 1 year and its always been complicated, we have broken up so many times, he drinks way to much and talks to me like I am dirt sometimes .He can say the most hurtful things and not even think twice about it,but then he can make me laugh and be so sweet. I know that he does love me but i just dont think that its enough for me. When were good we are really good but when we are bad, well you know the rest!
Its crazy because I am a very strong person in a lot of other ways and I have been through a lot in my life but when it comes to him im weak, I know I can do so much better.
I buried a class mate yesterday and he started a fight with me over something so stupid straight after the funeral, we had a massive fight and i finished it last night, then he called to me this morning and like a fool i let him into my head again and forgave him. I just know i have to get away from him,i do love him but not as much as i should. he can be very controlling. ive been strong in the past but its like he keeps breaking me down time and time again and i always cave in when i know in my heart he is not for me  .I just seem to keep going around in circles and its stripping my confidence away.I could really do with some advice on how to finish it for good so he wont keep trying. Can anybody help me? Be blunt be honest i just need advice.thanks so much :)
seajunky seajunky 22-25, F 5 Responses Apr 2, 2011

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That was so lovely Anachel,thank you so much.and yes i haven't had the best examples in life,and i really think that has alot to do with it.but i am happy to say i am now going to go traveling and find myself or improve myself!

i feel im getting stronger and stronger everyday.its a truly empowering feeling.im leaving my past and all the badness that comes with it behind me.fresh start :)

thank ye so much for your help,i think im acutely there now,im just going to continue ignoring him and move on with my life.i am better then that **** and sick of being a door mat for him.peace x

be strong

I'm so sorry you are in this so called relationship. I promise you he will not change for he knows you will take what he is dishing out. He has no respect for you. He is a controler and a user. I know because I have wasted my own life with this type of person.Don' waste yours. Something has happened to make him this way. I feel sorry for him but more sorrow for you. Get out of it wake up to

reality before its to late. There are people that can help you. Your are important, You do count, you are

special. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Try to find someone positive who can help.

Man.. I really feel for you. The loss of an intimate relationship, esp to the one who's being left can be at the very least a life threatening, completely dangerous situation that can bring forth unbelievable mental anguish that is simply beyond the sufferers capacity to accept or live with. I once had to move (just a mile away worked, being in a big city to start with) to sever a relationship once. Hey, if it's me or you, and my life depended on it, I have no qualms about rescuing myself. Believe in yourself, and WATCH OUT, if someone doesn't treat you right. Collect wholesome friends to be around all the time. Friends can be invaluable sounding boards. God Bless you, and good luck to you.