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He Reminded Me Of Me

I wrote this one recently. It is the first poem I have finished in a few months.

He Reminded Me of Me Written by, err... Me. :)

I saw a boy of five today
Who reminded me of me
And though time passes in a blink
The boy did not yet see
And his mind was filled with wonder.

He stared right past me where I stood
As the train passed by Santa's sleigh
A bell chimed out with a clang
Inviting the boy to come play
And his eyes were filled with wonder.

The mother tried to contain his joy
As she grabbed at his coat in vain
But there was no stopping this little boy
Who ran hurriedly toward the train
And his face was filled with wonder.

He called out rather frantically
For his mother to look and see
They smiled and hugged as I smiled too
For the boy reminded me of me
And my mind was filled with wonder.
thatguy1970 thatguy1970 41-45, M 14 Responses Dec 6, 2011

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That is a lovely poem my friend, the joys of youth and the freedom in young gestures!
You can write poetry, very good poetry at that.

I like this very much. We all want to go back to our childhood at times. I bet you were a handsome little boy. :-)

Oh yea that has happend to me too, I smile then get sad because sometimes i feel like i didnt enjoy my childhood as i should have but oh well.

Everyone has their own feelings about such a moment. Mine was simply a vibrant memory of my own youth when I was so excited about the simplest of things. I miss that boy, but someone suggested he may still be in me somewhere. :) Thank you for your comment.

ooh yea, i think we are all kids in a way. i can be sometimes :P

beautiful :-)

Thank you Lena. :)

Great poem :) Like it very much

Thanks. :)

you are welcome

Thank you blusongbird. So young yet such a poet. I suspect you might make a great college professor. :) The poems I post on EP often are among my first drafts. I rarely edit them here. I do keep them written down also and I also have a blog where I "store" them. I do edit them there and I will keep your advice in mind. Have a great day. :)

You should probably take out the word "right" in line 6, and possibly "as" in the next line. The "as" in line 12 should, in my opinion, be replaced by "but," which would mean you'd have to take the "but" out of the next line, of course. But these are all just little things to reduce redundancy, you've obviously spent some time on this.

As for the subject matter...

Ya, I think I know that feeling, suddenly you see where they will go and how they will change and hurt and it makes you sad? Because you don't want them to lose the sense of wonder, and whatever it represents. But then you realize that they won't lose it (you haven't lost it), it's still there underneath, and so you are glad for both of you, and the overall emotion is positive.

NO words just cheers!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks a bunch. :)

I think we can go back, You just did. I wrote something along these lines awhile back, about swinging on a swing and feeling a sense of wonderment. I thought too about how I miss that little girl that I was. And then I came to the same conclusion that you did--that she never really left me. She is still with me, as your little boy is with you. It is nice when you can have realizations like that in life. It is even better when you can articulate them as beautifully as you did. I love that little kid.

You get it. That little boy still lives within me, my mind filled with wonder about it all.

Tell him I said Merry Christmas.

He said thank you and Merry Christmas. Plus, he wants a new video game. :)

Haha. My inner child wants an Ipad. We all have dreams.

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Nice poem!!

Thank you papri. :)

Really tugged on my heart strings, reminds me of my brother that has now passed on. Christmas is hard for some of us, the memories are "bittersweet," thanx 4 sharing this.

Sorry to hear about your brother.

Thank you wajid. :)

Superb!! Keep on moving :)

Love it :D

Thanks. :)