Real Me

My friends in real life seem to only see a part of me, as if I am acting around them or something. I've grown up to be so withdrawn and guarded about what I say, that I usually hardly get anything out. They sometimes think that when I pause to think about a response, that I don't want to tell them the truth, or that I don't want to bother. Sometimes. They know me well enough to say that I am anti-social and would rather not talk something serious face to face. [I prefer an instant messanger, or to talk at night, when everyone is very tired anywho]

When I StumbleUpon'd this site, I thought it was so wonderful! A place where I can be all of me, without anyone knowing different. I want to meet people here, I want to share who I am. It's always easier to do that online for me too. I love the concept of this site!
Kagit Kagit
18-21, F
4 Responses Jul 25, 2007

Its hard to stradle that border of being sensitive so you don't say something inoofeensive but not overanalysing everything makes you seem aloof an ungenuine. oF course on a net you can't tell that someone is pausing to think or that they edited a word before they hit 'submit'. Which is great. I know that back in the old days chatting got me over some of my fear of talking to people. I still am not a chatterbox but definately better than I use to. :) I analyse what I say more online though because its 'permanent' more than the words I say to friends are. usually they don't even remember them. lol

Omg I have had the same problem....i would pause because i would try to think of what to say without hurting or getting my feelings hurt and while not being truthful with myself about myself with others i would often get misunderstood.....sometimes its hard to tell the truth about ourselves because we are afraid of what they might say about you or to u....do not let anybody invalidate you.....you are you and accept you...

I StumbleUpon'd this site too! And I would like to have more friends! Friends galore! I don't have any friends in real life, so talking to people on the internet is the closest I can get!

Instead of pausing to think before replying, I usually just blurt out the first response that comes to mind. The reception: they think i'm a little cuckoo, or not really paying attention. Either way, it gets me off the hook! EP is great for me too, as I do find it easier to talk about "serious" stuff online.