I Want Some To Understand

I'm 14 and i want people to understand this is my story.... I was adopted as a baby never knew my real mom. My adopted parents said that she gave me away because my real father was a drunk and he kicked her,me and my 8 year old brother out of the house at the time she had know where to go so she kept my brother because he was 8 people were really adopting kids so she gave me up. it all started at 7 i was suicidal i was always running and trying to kill and cut myself. i went to 3 different therapist from ages 8 to 12 i didnt work they had problems themselves and they all just gave me ADHD medicine it didnt work. At 10 my self esteem got low very i would wear nothing but jackets and hold my head down when ever i walked and i cut myself alot and was suicidal. I never had any friends really i was very angry and i would cuss at my parents and threaten to kill them and myself. my parents almost sent me away to kid homes several times. my mind is and was very demonic. i never believed in god because i thought that if he was real why am i so crazy. my parent think its something wrong with me and it is i have ADHD,bipolar,paranoia,and schizophrenia. i heard demon ever day and they tell me to do things and if i dont they will hurt me. ever since i was little i would feel dark presents and see and hear stuff but tv was telling me it wasnt real it tho. its hard im not suicidal or trying to kill my parents anymore. but i still have the adhd,bipolar,paranoia,and schizophrenia tho. i believe in god now and ive learned things that the church and so called prophets on tv havent told people. i know he is real. but my voices say act a fool and have fun but at the end is it worth burning to a crisp forever but i want to be good holy and peaceful so i can enjoy spending forever with black jesus. but these crazy mental disorder that i have have to go now before the end of the year. no the world is not going to end but this year is the awakening of bigger demons if you had spirtual gifts you might have felt strong eneries this year i have.
SuicidalSoul SuicidalSoul
13-15, F
1 Response Sep 17, 2012

You've been through a lot, like me, but I got the feeling you're stronger than you think you are. Message me