In Iowa and In My Everyday Life

 i want Jake ... but he lives 3 states away .. its not feasible and im trying to tell myself the honest truth its not gonna happen ;...
" it'll make you cry , make you break down shatter your illusions of love  Is it over now do you know how to pick up the pieces and go on ?"  I dont even know if i want it to end .... in my heart ... I love him ... i know i should let go ... but i dont really want to ..  I enjoy loving him and i know he loves me ... and if its in Gods will we will be together .
 from my marriage .. i learned to settle ...  i dont want to settle and im not going to .. once i get my SSI things are going to change ... im going to  be able to buy my kids the things they want ... and im more careful with my money now that i did go through the mental abuse and fighting for milk for my kids .  im more simple ... and i dont want a new outfit from the mall every week ...  but my kids will get the things I cant give them now ...  as soon as i get the lump sum .. i will take them shopping .. and get them the things they want .
starstruck2xtrme starstruck2xtrme
26-30, F
Aug 22, 2007