I Want To Be A Mom So Bad

I AM 21 YRS OLD AND ALL I THINK ABOUT IS HAVING A BABY OF MY OWN.I WORK FULL TIME IN MY FAMILY DAYCARE AND HAVE BEEN SINCE I WAS 14.I USE TO SAY I DON'T WANT KIDS OR I CANT SEE MYSELF BEING A MOM.BUT FOR THE PAST YEAR IVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT HAVING A BABY.THE PAST 3 MONTHS HAS GOTTEN REALLY BAD CAUSE I CANT THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE BUT BEING PREGNANT.I SEE MY SISTER BEING A REALLY GREAT MOM TO MY 2YR OLD NIECE AND ID KILL TO BE JUST LIKE HER.I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO OR HOW TO STOP STRESSING OVER IT BUT I TRULY WANT A BABY SO FREAKING BAD.I'M OK WITH GIVING UP THE PARTYING AND FREE TIME IN ORDER TO BE A PARENT.I SEE WOMEN WITH KIDS WHO JUST COMPLAIN OR DON'T REALLY TAKE CARE OF THEIR KIDS AND I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY GOD CAN GIVE THEM KIDS AND NOT ME.I WANT TO BE A MOM SO BAD I THINK ITS STARTING TO TAKE OVER MY THOUGHTS.sad
keyia89 keyia89
18-21, F
3 Responses Aug 5, 2010

im 35yrs old and ive only been pregnant one time and didnt know. the nite i found out i was actully mis-carring. im still messed up behind that. but it took me 2yrs to actively begin 2live. i felt like God was expressing how much he hate me! ive always tooken care of other people kids even my moms. had legal custody of my cousins kids along time ago. she was going to call children service on herself so they could come in get her kids, so i said to her i know she can do this shes just alittle bit tired and need some help. she had 5at the time i took( 2)oldest girlwhich i had off in on sence she was born and newbaby1 1/2month. no goverment assistance i bought the baby milk which at that time was like $3.19 acan. i got anothet job partime. but i nevered complained i enjoyed it. when i was a child myself i even had to care for me and my sisters even tho my mom was still alive and dad and a older borther. but they did for theyselves and left me 2care for my sisters. it hurted but we made it and are very strong women now. and even tho i feel un loved at times by God i know he was there. i just dont no what disquilfies me from having a desierd chance to have and raise my own. i would love it if i new what he want me 2do because i crawl inside myself with the grief and pain daily concernin this desire i have. and if he's saying no please give me the same feeling that i may move on cause right now i'm drowning in sorrow and more. wanting 2be a mother 2a little healthy me.

I have had that same feeling lately too! I never really knew if I wanted to be a mom until recently. I always had my doubts about whether or not I could handle it until this summer when I got married. I saw how my sister struggled with being a single mother of 2 and did not know if I could handle it. My husband is very supportive and loves children. We had a few serious conversations about what this would mean for us and ever since I have had baby fever! Even though I have this burning desire to be pregnant I know that waiting unitl now at 27 was right for me. I guess it took me a while to mature and be ready to give up all my "me time". You seem to have matured a lot faster than I did. I wish you the best of luck!

The mums complain because it is extremly hard work. Its easy to say you are willing to sacrifice the partying and free time because you have not yet had to do that. Being a mum is an amazing blessing. Its full of Joy and reward and there is nothing else like it. I love my Children more than i have words to describe. But i miss the me time also. Gods timing is always right. And he will bless you with being a mother in his time. Which is always better than our time. Enjoy what you have now. Your young:) And Trust God has it all under control.