In Which I Confess My Plans To Become Agent Milky Bourne

I told him some stories about men who'd shared some things with me. Intimate things, and mundane stuff.  I didn't mention that I'd watched and listened to some of them ******* off or shoving adjustable vibrators up their buttholes.  There are some things my son doesn't need to know about my activities.  They may come out in my novels, but I'm not going to tell him as we're driving home together from a pleasant evening with friends.

My boy and I were headed back to Chez Nips after a very long day at a speech and debate tournmanent when I began to recount a few of the stories I'd read from fellows recently.  Some were funny.  Some were poignant.  Some related to politics and government, the career field of many of the men with whom I correspond.

And that is when my son made his suggestion.  I'd toyed with the idea, of course.  The kids have often said that I have an uncanny ability to ferret out information from folks without even trying.  They've said that the CIA should hire me to interrogate terrorists.  To infiltrate groups and learn all their secrets.  They don't know that their father used to work for the CIA, indirectly, doing some research for that agency when he was at university.  People quietly work as part of the intelligence community without all the danger of James Bond films.  They gather data, and put it together, and then sometimes prevent bad things.  For every September 11th that occurs, there are zillions that don't because of the efforts of men and women throughout the world. 

"You should go to work for the CIA, Ma," said my child.  "Seriously."

"I plan to," I said.  "Once you and your sister are out of the house."  And as I said it, I knew that I was speaking the truth.  It may not be the CIA, exactly, but it will be some agency that will use my special talents, my unassuming appearance as a middle aged suburban matron and my good listening skills, to do good.  I will make a difference.  But I will not do it as long as I am still raising my children.  I do not want to risk their safety.  Once I am on my own, I am prepared to travel all over the world.  I will meet people.  And listen to them.  And report back what I learn.

With a bit of luck, there will also be some lovemaking.  Even in the midst of fleeing Treadstone, Jason Bourne got lucky with Marie after he dyed her hair.  James Bond got to take a shower with Severine.  Surely I can have my moments of passion as well.  I did not mention that part to my son, though.
milkynips milkynips
46-50, F
4 Responses Dec 3, 2012

That is great, it is great! I know that at least you thought that before you "find" child endangerment, then you can go to the Immigration community of each nation, and find out that, wile you were busy for the "CIA", your son never was a double crossing spy! ...really. Look out for the guy who, was married before he was a spy 'back in the old days".


Your problem won't be your field work for the Consensual Intercourse Agency, you'll be quite good at that, with all the ropes and chains, whips and flails necessary to extract information from the those with the power to resist your charms (Does such a man even exist?!). No, your problem will be what to do with the reams of research that you accumulate. How will you have time to process the mundane when there are secrets to be pried? Clearly, you'll have to outsource your needs. It's the new American way!

You WOULD be a great spy. Who could resist your charms!

Milky as a spy? That would certainly be something to see.