Well HelloMy name is Charlotte. I'm 18, just graduated high school. And I had a baby at 14.
Yeah. 14. Before I was even in high school I had a baby girl named Clary. I'm a student, a book store clerk, a girlfriend a swimmer...but my most important role is Mommy. And I was extremely lucky. Lucky that my boyfriend and I have incredible families that have helped us so much financially, with babysitting, with advice, with love and understanding. I'm lucky that my aunt and uncle, who have raised me since my dad's passing when I was 12, are upper middle class and have money to spend on stuff for Clary that I can't afford myself. I'm lucky that I'm still with Ben, my quote "baby daddy" who is my best friend, my soul mate and my fiance along with my partner in raising Clary.
But I don't get much sleep. I don't get any me time. I don't shop for myself and despite being a dedicated athlete it took me 9 months to fit (badly) into the jeans I'd worn before becoming pregnant. My nipples will never be the same and if talking about nipples makes you squeamish just WAIT until you're pregnant and for that matter a mom. Believe me I've seen things that make grown men's stomachs twist. My daughter is a fire ball which sounds super cute until it's 9 pm and you have a calculus test the next day and she can't stop running around pretending to be an airplane. Aww it sounds cute right? Until she runs into your laptop and bam, there goes studying and there goes your English paper. Before you have a kid, I recommend getting a puppy. Take that experience and multiply it times a hundred, gain 40 pounds and add in some postpartum depression and that's what having a baby is like a lot of the time. Oh and don't sleep for about 4 days. Literally, 0 sleep. Like not even five minutes. Oh except for when you fall asleep in class and everyone laughs at you and your teacher tells you to balance home life and school life better. Also, add in being harassed online and in the halls being called a ***** and ****. And a crying baby. All night. Thankfully, and it's sad to say, I'm nearly 100% deaf so it didn't bother me nearly as bed as it bothered Ben, her father.
And you think you're gonna be a single mom? Oh my GOD!! I think single moms deserve an entire week during the year paid for by the tax payers where they get treated like queens because if you think having a baby is easy in ANY WAY whatsoever you are so very wrong and in for a massive shock. Seriously, a lot of girls are like "oh I've gone ok on only a little sleep, no problem" and yeah sure, for a few nights it's bearable. But try going through that non
Oh and the "I'll just get a job to pay for my baby" thing. Yeah. Really, you try raising a baby on one income. And if you get thrown out of your house you'll starve or have to take taxpayer money and guess what? People will hate you for it. And rightfully so consdiering you WANT to do that. In the words of my friend Alissa "When there's not enough to feed us, I don't eat". Yeah. You try skimping on meals on no sleep and see how your demeanor is! Plus, if you think you'll save money by breast feeding, that's assuming you'll be able to breast feed and it's exhausting. Also, sometimes babies refuse to do it. It's a struggle. I was lucky, I could breast feed Clary but like I said my nipples are so ****** up you can't even imagine. Oh and diapers. No really. I know you've heard their expensive but just look at a diaper budget for one baby for a month. Just a month. Then pull out your calculators and multiply it by 12 and proceed to watch your heads explode. Also, doctors visits, toys, clothes, blankets, nursery stuff, crib, stroller, wipes, baby hygeine products, food, formula, possible daycare (which is OUTRAGEOUS!! especially for a baby), medicine (gotta be prepared). You can't wait to dress up your baby? Well clothes cost money and guess what? They're a baby so they'll probably get it messed up anyway.
Oh, and you want to move out on your own? With a baby?? Pfft. Not unless mommy and daddy foot the bill and most parents aren't too excited about teen pregnancies so good luck with that. With moving out you get to pay rent, pay for utilities, phone bill, internet bill, electricity, gas (for the car you'll need to get to work and so that if your baby gets sick you can take them to the hospital, so having your license is a must) so add in then money to get your license, car payment, car insurance, furniture, groceries, clothes for yourself (which you'll eventually need), other incidentals (although kiss money for movies etc goodbye!) etc etc etc. Yeah. Welcome to Reality!
I get it. You want to be moms. But become a mom when you can give your child the best life possible. It's not fair to them. Go to school. Get an education. Save up some money. Get your own place. And is it fair to expect your parents to help you???? ESPECIALLY when you do it on purpose????? No. And don't count on them. If my daughter pulled a stunt like that G-d Bless her little heart but I'd make her step into reality and see how effing hard it is. Being a young mom is one thing. But be PREPARED.
You want someone to love? seriously. Get a puppy. Not a human being. They aren't dolls. Being a mommy isn't a game. And I know you say we assume you're immature.
But guess what. We have proof. Anyone who is selfish and naive enough to purposefully have a baby this young is immature.