Not What They Wanted

But i want for myself ....if i can accomplish that then It wouldnt matter to me if i had someone in my life or not ...  not that it matters  now because im too independent but if Jake came to me and told me to bugger off then Id be okay as to where i am right now it would crush me . i thought ( and still do sometimes ) that i needed to do all these things  that im doing to become more confident and healthy to hopefully be able to show  him how much ive changed ... but then i realized i  need to do it for myself . not for someone else it should be MORE IMPORTANT  to make myself happy for myself , My kids and God ( because he doesnt want us to  have all these toxins in our systems  our bodies are his house  why would he want them to be polluted ) But ive made ^ my mind im doing all these things for myself to increase MY wellness , MY confidence  not to make someone want me for how i look its about who i am inside that should matter anyways  yes physical attraction is  a neccesary thing but  when it comes down to it he should be able to see the difference on the inside to who i am now  from who i used to be .
starstruck2xtrme starstruck2xtrme
26-30, F
Mar 22, 2007