Great Few Nights!!!

I have accepted what I am for a few months now and been on HRT for a month. I have been allowing my female side (Rose) to come out and I have been enjoying her. She is out going and a little out spoken, something my male side (John) is not.

John was always a shy, timid person that found it hard to interact with people. The few friends he had was only because of his little sister and though he enjoyed being included in their activities he was not in to all that macho stuff they did. He would go along for the ride and participate only for the interaction of his male friends.

Now from time to time Rose would try and come out to play only to be pushed back down by John. There was one major reason that Rose was never aloud out and that was because of Homophobic Joe. Joe had been molested as a child by his father, making him hate anything heterosexuality normal. John and Rose both wanted the acceptance of Joe since he was their father.

For twenty-five years Rose laid in wait. Waiting for the time of her release. In the summer of 2012 she finally was able to come forward and was accepted by John for being what they were meant to be. Rose made her presence known. She told her mother and her eldest sister who both said they accepted her.

Rose then talked to several doctors and therapist and after the three months they set down she was on HRT. Rose now felt right and was very happy in who she was. Rose being out going like she is has made several friends and enjoys being with them.

Yesterday while at work a couple of women came in and bought a few things. Before they left they were asking for my phone number. (giggle) If only they knew . I wondered why I suddenly had woman fawning over me when they had avoided me my whole life.

However I was surprised again today. First was two guys that came in to buy some beer. I knew one of them and knew he was gay, as for his friend I had only seen him a few times. Before they left the other guy was hitting me. He was telling me how nice I looked, how good my hair looked since I am letting it grow. (giggle) I was flabbergasted by the compliments but I am not gay, or rather I do not want anything in my back door.

Later another friend came by with his wife and kids, one that befriended John but has accepted Rose. His wife and child came into the store and while the youngest was using the bathroom the eldest said I looked much younger. The wife (mom to the kid) agreed and asked what I was doing differently. I just told her I had been clean shaven now, but in truth I believe it do more to the hormones I am taking though I did not tell her that last part. 

I enjoy myself much more as Rose than I ever did as John. John is not gone nor do I think he will ever be but Rose is here to stay and play.

Rose35 Rose35
36-40, T
2 Responses Jan 12, 2013

I am not surprised that Rose is getting a lot more attention. Why wouldn't she? She is probably a lot more approachable because you are finally a lot happier.

I am much happier as Rose and have no fear of talking to people now. As John talking to anyone made me nervous. I would get rude comments about things I like as being gay or girly and John did not like that. As Rose I do not care what others think as long as I am me. John was shy and rarely stood up to people, Rose is out spoken and is not afraid to tell you how it is.

Rose is a blessing and she is me.

Then I would say you have certainly found your true self.

Nicely written Rose...sweet