Maybe Love Alone Isnt Enough..

I am going through the break up as i write this. We were together till almost yesterday for past three and a half years. When i met him for the first time, we both knew this is it..slowly we got back in touch and i moved in from day one. The honeymoon and the romance phase was over in 3-4 months and we got back to work, still much in love. He started getting busier with work and late nights but still showered all the love when he could. His work makes him travel a lot and in a month there were times, when we saw each other just 4-5 times. He always knew i am there at home for him waiting, with a smile. May be i was too submissive. I barely went out with friends cause he wasnt very fond of me doing late nights. Also i hardly have any friends cause i was not in my country for sometime and when i got back i moved in with him. I started to miss him, having dinner alone everyday, going to bed alone and having no one to talk to about general day to day affairs..I gave in to alcohol but man! do i love him. I complained, cried, requested and never did i go for some other guy, flirted or cheated despite longing for a touch from him. Guess, work kept him too busy and i know he loves me still but not willing to be bit flexible. I am not at home and i have been told not to come back cause i finally said it yesterday i cant do this anymore. We have a cat, who i love to bits and i wont get to see him ever again. I dont know what went wrong. I am tired of crying but its not ending. This break up phase has been going for 5 months with sleeping in different rooms, avoiding conversations but now i feel even that was good than this. I have been crying for months with sprinkles of smiles, I miss him and it hurts. I miss him touching my cheek..i miss him pulling my leg when i would be clumsy..i miss cooking for him and waiting for his praises..i cant cry anymore but tears wont stop..I cant go back cause i feel i know why i got out but in the back of my head ..was it really that bad? I cant deal with it...
chicx1 chicx1
May 17, 2012