How the Heart Works; Will I Ever Understand?

So all my life over and over again ; I vow to remove this ******* magnet I have in my forehead. Only to find out that its stuck!

Since a young age I have continued to date men who "need" and "take" but never give. I'm not even sure what love is suppose to feel like. But I do know that when you have more bad days than you have good there is something wrong! Love is suppose to come naturally right? Its where you can be yourself, know that other person is there to hold you up when your weak and share in your joy and vice versa. Only I feel like I give and give and even when I am weak I don't show that side of me; perhaps I am too independent and or afraid to expose that side of me with the men I choose to date?

So I was on a six mo pattern, till I met J...thinking he was "different" I put my all into this relationship.Little did I know he was not only full of skeletons but the one that would ultimately hurt me! I view relationships so different now. I wonder if this circle I keep going in ever ends.

Has love been right in front of me and I missed it?

I married at a very young age of 17 to a man who I still wear scars from. When I finally worked up to divorce my cheating,abusive husband at 24 I never imagined that my path to love would be so miserable. What is it I am lacking? What am I missing.

While lots of men are anxious to "take" from me and or use my giving heart to their advantage. It leaves me wondering when karma will come save me?!

Is love a game or is it just a foreign language in that I don't understand?!

hunny28 hunny28
26-30, F
1 Response Feb 10, 2009

I'm sorry hon :( <br />
<br />
If you happen to ever understand the foreign language...please translate for me! I don't get it either.