I Think I Cry Everyday

I don't know if you understand how it feels to be completely alone in the world. But I do. I've for as long as I can remember been this way. Always searching for one person to love me or to understand me or to just have someone to talk to. I've always been the odd one out whether It was my friends or my family. I don't know what to do to make people want to be around me or want to talk to me. It has gotten to the point where I cry almost everyday. I just don't know what to do.

GibsonR23 GibsonR23
18-21, F
4 Responses Feb 27, 2010

I feel tha same, but hold on cause there is someone out there<br />
you dont aways have to be alone

you are not alone.<br />
many people feel this way.<br />
I have felt this way myself.<br />
Alone, alienated, different...<br />
It led me to create my film and album, hoping that it will make a difference to someone.<br />
believe me when I tell you I have been there, and come trough the other side.<br />
Keep believing things will get better, and remember that you are not alone.

Look i used to feel that way during my school years. I never had the same interests as every single girl around my age, i could not find even one person to share a desk with, most of the times i could not find someone to talk to during the break. People used to occupy with me for two reasons, to tease me or to laugh at me. I seemed to always make the wrong move at the wrong time. We both make a mistake. we want so much to have company that people around us can feel it. They understand we feel miserable and different and they enjoy the control we have given to them unconsciously. When i became fifteen years old i let go, i stopped bothering whether i could find someone to come to the cinema wtih me, i just went alone. I stopped bothering whether one of my classmates would sit next to me on the coach that took me back home from school everyday, i stopped bothering whether they liked or not liked the fact i had no boyfriend in my teens and i had not kissed a boy yet, i stopped bothering that people did not find my stories interesting , never laughed with my jokes and so on. I am not a freak! i am a normal person and i am now very sociable. I turned into a much more "indifferent person" that would be fine whether i had company or not, a person that would not run after anybody, a person that learned to say no when she didn't like something and didn't try to cover up her own feelings just to have company around. You are definitely not alone. You can talk to us , your EP friends. You can tell us anything! So many of us might feel the same. You won't find the perfect match right away. Most probably i am not the one that will understand you the way you would want me to. But feel free to write to me about whatever preoccupies you. I'll make an effort to understand you. and if you keep writing at EP there will be other people that share the same experiences and might feel the same way and will be willing to open up to you. If you are not popular doesn't mean you are not special !

AHHH we should talk. I feel EXACTLY the same way!!! I used to cry everyday, still cry every now and then. And I feel completely alone, and like I am the only person in the world who feels like I do. Also, I want to change but I don't know how because this is how I have been my whole life. I have social anxiety, and I am really anxious around girls my age (I guess since I've been picked on, felt left out of the group). Anyway, if you ever want to talk or feel like you're all alone... I know exactly what its like. I'm glad you posted this, at least there's two of us...??? Hang in there... we'll figure it out eventually.