The Constant Pain

Ive had a lot of things happen to me since I was a child. I was molested at the age of 7 and nearly raped and killed 2 years ago at my own party, I seriously feel that I have nothing to live for and I want to die on a daily basis, I feel that If I do, then maybe people can be happy again, Since I have had several people tell me all I've done is ruin their lives. My family doesn't understand me and they dint really want to, I have no one to talk to about any of my problems because I am told that I'm just trying to "Play the victim" card, and I'm not, I'm trying to reach out and grab something that's real because I didn't want to give up, I never wanted to give up on myself or my life but I have, because for me, I just cant see it getting better, I'm sick of everyone saying that things are going to get better soon because they ha vent yet, and Ive been hearing it since I was 7. I cant take it anymore, Every time I get into a relationship I get cheated on, and it hurts, they tell me they love me and that I'm the only girl for them and then I find out that Ive been being cheated on for many months or weeks or so. It kills me inside when people play games with my emotions, Lately all Ive been feelings is sadness and heartbreak. I am failing all of my classes because of my depression and things just seem to be getting worse and worse and I just cant take it anymore

Sweetsuicidalprincess17 Sweetsuicidalprincess17 16-17, F May 19, 2010

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