Ohh The Agony, The Agony.

Eventually I will get out of my slump and move on with my life, but for now you all have suffer through my misery just a little bit longer.  Sorry.  My spirits are a little better even though the ex has already professed true love to another a week after she broke up with me.  The funny thing is he took off in her car for two days and got doped out of his mind I guess.  Now apparently she has entered into a friends with benefits scenario but wants more out of it.  So I don't even know what to make of her anymore.  All I know is this true love is a guy that will drive over two thousand miles in one day to be with you.  It is a guy that will spend all his money trying to make you and your children happy.  It is a guy that always put you first even though you always put him last.  It is a guy that will stay with you longer than he should have and put up with the trauma that goes with helping you raise your kids.  Sorry but you must be blind if you never saw some of the things your two youngest kids did.  I know, I know everyone is going to criticize me and call me names, but you need to understand the way those kids were.  I caught the youngest spitting in the middle child's face.  I caught her going through prescriptions and my even my wallet.  I caught her lighting paper and pencils on fire with a candle.  I caught her pouring water down the back of a television.  I even caught her mixing household cleaning supplies in a mason jar and water bottle.  I saw this kid once jump off a couch on top of a 10 year old dog and start punching him.  All she could say to me was it was an accident.  That kid knocked an xbox 360 off a dresser and all she could say to me was I didn't do it.  She was the only one in the room at the time.  It took her three months to apologize, and she only did that because I wasn't going to let her play the new one.  I sent her to bed once because of the fire lighting situation and she threw amongst other things at me a pencil, a hard plastic ball full of water, and a book.  A couple of times I had to actually pick her up and put her in her room, and she had the audacity to punch and kick me.  Now for those that might question why I would pick a child up and put her in her room, she was hocking loogies at the 12 year old.  We took her and the other children to the movie New Moon and after spending two hundred dollars and the completion of the movie she flipped out in the middle of a packed theater because we had no money to let her see Santa Claus.  Now don't forget the 12 year old.  The first weekend living in your house do you remember what she did.  I bet you do.  The ex, the 6 year old, and I were out back tearing down and old shed.  And along comes your 12 year old with a **** eating grin on her face.  Not five minutes after being out there the 6 year old was screaming and you were in a confrontation with the 12 year old.  She even shoved you.  And to top it off she had the temerity to slam your 6 year old into a wall.  But oh they acted that way because of me.  I supposed it was my fault that I heard Britney screaming and watched her run past our bedroom door with Katie on hot on her trail.  What about what I saw next Tammy.  Explain to me what I was supposed to think when I run out into the living room to see what the commotion was and found Katie pinning Britney to chair by her throat with a fist cocked way back ready to blast  6 year old in the face.  Or how about the time Katie told Britney that if she had a knife she would slit her throat.  Or how about Katie telling Britney that she wished she was dead.  Now you really blame me for that crap.  Come on.  I did everything for those kids and everytime I did something the minute whatever it was they wanted was accomplished they went right back into I don't give a crap mode.  How dare you blame me for Katie lighting fires in her bedroom.  She is 12 years old, for damn sakes.  How dare you blame me for Katie telling her bus driver to f*** off. Or how about the time she got video taped slamming another student across the face.  True fact the principal told me so.  They wanted to call in a superintendant meeting about her.  But it was my fault.  You told me in February I have to give them respect to get their respect.  I will never ever respect a 12 year old girl that beats the crap out of a helpless 6 year old never.  I don't care how you justify it.  I won't respect a 12 year old that demands I buy her school clothes or she won't go to school.  She spent all day at her father's house why didn't he buy them.  Nope she demanded I buy them.  I refuse to respect a 6 year old that stands in the middle of Wal-Mart screaming that she wants toys.  I refuse to respect a child that demands I take them to the science center and then throws a temper tantrum because I didn't have the money to go to the gift shop.  We only went to that science center because of her and what about her throwing a book bag full of books across the back seat of my car and hitting your six year old in the head with it.  You want me to respect that.  No way.  Or how about all the times she screamed at me about no ever doing anything for poor little Katie.  Huh.  I did so much for those kids and they treated me like crap.  You talk about how much heart break can someone take before you can't break a heart no more.  Explain please.  I drove 2000 miles to Texas to be with you.  I bought you a brand new car, that you let your new man take off in for two days.  But all you can say is its nothing personal I need to respect your decision.  No way.  I am still paying for the car you liar.  People she actually told when she broke up with that she didn't have time for a relationship and has to think of the girls.  Well a week after she broke up with me she was talking true love and prince charming crap about some guy that took off in a 20,000 car and on top of that he got hopped up drugs to boot.  But you are thinking of your girls lovely choice there liar.  Apparently now she in a friends with benefits scenario with some guy living in her apartment complex.  But she don't have the courage to give me back my car.  Let's not get started on the things you caused.  How about not paying for your utilities and your own home.  Who did that huh.  How about the fact that I spent my monthly VA pension check the first day of the month.  How about the fact that we had no money for food around Thanksgiving and Christmas but you planned on buying 80 dollar highlights at cost cutters for all three kids.  Huh.  How come I paid for everything.  How come you took care of the things the girls wanted and not what they needed.  They didn't need cell phones with unlimited text messaging, they needed food and clothes.  That is what child support is for.  Not a new dog that they stopped having anything to do with.  Oh yeah she bought a dog for these girls and once the novelty wore off guess who was walking poor little Pumpkin in two feet of snow.  Me.  Guess who spent three hours trying to get Pumpkin to come home when Britney let her out the front door.  Me.  Although I give mad props to Katie she was the only one that helped, God forbid we could get Ashley off the couch long enough to help.  Where were you the day Britney walked up and punched me in the face.  or how about the day Katie told me she felt like slapping me for no reason.  No reason people, she said it not me.  How you only yelled at me I told her if she does I will slap her back.  Huh.  How about August when I spent a thousand dollars on Britney for her birthday.  Why didn't you say something to Britney then when she told me I know you bought me a book for my birthday but when are you going to get me real presents.  I spent a THOUSAND DOLLARS on her trying to make her life happy in my house.  Daddy only gave her 30 dollars Tammy.  And she gave it to the two boys up the street.  How about the day she flipped out on me because I made her a peanut butter and jelly sandwich cut in quarters with the crust cutt off.  Question to all those that read this if your kid asks you for a sandwich and tells you they will get the things out for it.  You walk out into the kitchen and see peanut butter and jelly, bread, a clean plate, and a clean butter knife.  What sandwich would you make huh.  Apparently I'm stupid I thought she wanted peanut butter and jelly.  And never forget everything I ever did you had some criticism.  Everything.  I turned wrestling on once you accused me of watching it because of the blondes.  No I wasn't I only watched it because of Katie your daughter, she was a fan of John Cena.  Or how about you accusing me of not wanting to be with you just because I rolled over onto my right side.  Hey I have osteoporosis my left hip hurts when its cold.  That was all.  All you can say to me is I have anger management issues.  Please.  When someone screams at me on a daily basis eventually I will scream back.  You throw a ball and hit me in the face I am going to get angry too.  And if I catch a child stealing money out of my wallet I believe I have a right to say something.  She wasn't curious she was stealing and you did nothing.  The last thing you said to was you arent settling for anything but the best that you deserve.  Well as long as you and your kids continue to treat people like you do you are going to have a long wait.  I will be the only guy that will last as long as I did.  I hope you know I will be making contact with the police to get my car back, you don't deserve it.  No way.

Sorry people I know I sound bitter but I needed to vent.
thomasriley99 thomasriley99
31-35, M
Jul 20, 2010