I Wish I Could, But It May Be Too Late

How many times have you heard a child say "when I grow up, I want to be" , usealy its something like a fireman, an astronot, a super hero...what ever, the point is that its alright to have dreams, and sometimes dreams come true.....and sometimes they aren't "alowed to".

Growing up my dreams were always alittle closer to earth, more obtainable then most kids I grew up with. But for some reason, no matter what dirrection my dreams wanted to take me it was always the "wrong" dirrection for my parents. The first time I can remember having a dream for my future I was 6. All I wanted was to grow up and join the army. My family has a strong military tradition, so you would think that it was something my parents would support. Not a chance! It took a couple years to talk me out of my dream of a life in the military, but they did finaly get thier way. Eventualy I did join the Air Force Reserve, but that was a long shot from what I had origanily wanted.

After my military dream was shot down, my parents nurtured an intrest in science in me, I guess thinking it was something that would take my mind to places I could never realy go. As it turned out I realy did have an aptitude for science and quickly developed an intrest in the fields of geology, marine biology, paleontology and archyology. That was something that stayed with me all the way into high school, and by the time I was picking out my classes for my junior year my parents decided that "something needed to be done". I had picked out collage prep courses and had decided that it made scence to persue a career in marine biology, because that was the subject I realy understud the best, and I had the most intrest in it.

My parents FLIPPED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was told that I wasn't going to "waiste my life" chasing a dream that never would amount to anything. They signed me up instead for vocational courses instead or collage prep classes and enrolled me in auto shop and building trades.

Now here I am 27 years later, still turning a wrench for a living. I guess my parents won out, I did eventualy go to community collage, for small buiness management, and got an online degree in gunsmithing. But it's not the same, it isn't at all what I wanted for my future!

But now I sit here and wonder, is it too late? Too late to fallow my dreams? I don't know....But I do know I at least owe it to that kid inside me that wasn't affriad to dream, to at least try.
xj287 xj287
41-45, M
Dec 2, 2012