Can It Be Real?

I have, so many happy couples in my school, and tehy always walk down the hall hand-in-hand, they try and make out every chance they get in between classes, they hang out with eachother nearly 24/7, and what's worse, they never shut up about each other. So many people are like that, and it makes me, upset, because I feel like I'll never be able to have something like that, I'll never be able to have a real deep love with someone I truely care about, because the last time I was with someone I loved, he got ripped away from me by his mother moving him back to Japan...

I guess what this all boils down to is that I'm lonely and I don't want to be anymore, but I feel like I'll be lonely the rest of my life.

SilentCircus SilentCircus
18-21, F
2 Responses Mar 30, 2009

Okay no offense to anyone, but i hate when they say we're so young and we just have to wait to be happy... ugh. I want to be happy now, ya know? im sorry you feel lonely tool. you arent' alone though. I'm the same way thanks to my ex cheating on me over 11 times and i fear that i'll never find anyone who simplly loves me. but if you ever need to talk im here for you

I know it doesn't seem this way to you, since all you've known is the 17 years or so you've been alive, but you are still very young. There were several things I felt this way about at your age ("seems like I'll never have... or always be..."), and now, in retrospect, I realize how silly I was. A lot is going to happen after high school. A lot will happen in college. A lot will happen after college. I know this doesn't make the loneliness go away, but it can offer some perspective to get you through this time. Loneliness is a normal part of life, and it never really goes away, even when you have someone. Oh, it goes away for a time, but it keeps blowing back into your life like the unpredictable wind. There will be times when you are with your significant other and feel lonely. There will be times when you are in a crowd of people and feel lonely. You will find it hard to believe this, because I know I would have, but you really don't need that kind of relationship right now. Maybe in college or beyond, but at this point, it's a good time to start learning how to deal with loneliness, because if you don't it could get you in trouble in the future (I know because this is one of the things I wrestle with myself). If someone comes along now, great! Otherwise, focus on what's really important (study, family, personal growth, etc), and let the right one show up in due time.