I have a lot of days where I feel like I am a witness outside of my body - hearing, seeing and experiencing life without actually being a part of it or being a part of the body that is sitting there ignored.
It's one of my stranger feelings, one of my weirder reactions and it just seems to compound the fact that I am not a part of the world that I live in. And after I get myself brought back to reality, to feeling the body that is mine, I get depressed that I cannot belong to the people that I was witnessing, to this world that I must live and to reality where many could safely act as if you were bat-crazy for feeling this way at times.
Yet it is a part of me and when I start to trance off it comes without summoning. Is being real really worth it? Or should I be worried that it doesn't come any easier than it has? Questions that will always wait for non-satisfying answers.