I Wish That Someone Would Tell Me What To Do

I have no idea what I want to do in life, I'm 23 already I just don't know what path I am suppose to take or what is expected of me. It is sad actually because my dad always says to me where do you see yourself in ten years and I keep asking and asking that question to myself in ten years my dad will be a old man he'll probably be retired and my mother two they'll have nobody to look after them the way they need because I have difficulty finding a job and keeping one.

I don't understand why I can't keep my jobs or why I can't get any answers I wish to know what direction is the correct one to go that is all. The rest I'll sort out. I've had incredible near death experiences. Like one I rode on my scooter and the road was wet the light was green for me my brakes weren't working well and suddenly I had to brake for a car that shifted into my lane right before me and a clear, extremely clear voice in my head you have two choices brake now and end your life or break slowly it will hurt but you will live.

I screamed back at it I want to live I was afraid of death still am and I did like instructed. Another close encounter with a taxi skipping a red light I didn't have a voice but I knew to drive slower for some reason, a third happened lately my family was in the car and I just knew not to drive to fast or I'll be in a accident. I want to meet my guardian angel and ask him I know it's a him what he's doing what I should do how do I get out from my deep pit and get help from him why my question for where I should go is not being answered and all that.

Another one scary one I was alone in the house walking to the kitchen when suddenly I blacked out. luckily I grabbed onto the cabinets before I collapsed and all I knew was to clench on hard and convince myself to wake up as much as possible that was scary because when I woke up I knew it happened before a few time when I was small and I couldn't remember that but I remembered it the day in the kitchen clearly.

I also felt very sick once laying in my bed out of the blue I couldn't breathe and I saw a very white light and a strange feeling I didn't like it at all and forced myself up. It seems very strange I believe that we ourselves can choose if we want to die or not we get a choice I don't understand but wow it was a lot of weird experiences :)
shadewhisper shadewhisper
22-25, F
2 Responses Mar 22, 2012

Call it what you will, but there is this part of you – an innate wisdom, if you will – that has tried and tried and tried to get you to stop and fix a part of you that broke a long time ago but you've told yourself that you either don't have enough money, don't have enough time, don't have enough courage, don't have enough faith, don't have enough conviction, don't have enough belief in yourself, don't have enough love for yourself or any of the thousands of other reasons you've been rattling off to yourself every single day as justification for not stopping and trying to fix that part of you that broke down.<br />
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This innate wisdom inside of you – your other “YOU” – is tired of looking at its reflection in the mirror and seeing a shell, an empty husk.<br />
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“YOU” doesn't want this to be your life anymore but you haven't been listening to her so now, you've left “YOU” with no other recourse but to shut you down. So, in this way, what you're feeling now is the effect of this tool “YOU” is using to get you to STOP! and do anything and everything in your power to fix “YOU”.<br />
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“YOU” is on strike :)<br />
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The point is, listen to “YOU”. “YOU” has shut you down – and will keep you shut down – until you give “YOU” the life it so desperately wants. It's tired of hearing your rationalizations, your excuses - “YOU” wants no more of it!<br />
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The only way you'll make peace with “YOU” is by doing exactly what she wants :)<br />
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The wonderful thing is that, in the process of finally obeying “YOU”, you'll slowly feel MORE energy, MORE passion, MORE intelligence, MORE wisdom, MORE peace and MORE happiness, until one day, “YOU” has decided to turn you back on and has freed you from the aimless life you've been suffering through till now. <br />
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Listen to “YOU”. Start now! :)

that was awesome man thanks :)

You're very welcome my friend :)

Consider your life more like a dream. A "correct" choice is simply what you choose. Instead of thinking where would you see yourself, ask what you love... what would you love to be and do....ask what you require of you and what the universe requires of you. Ask what can make it all work so that you can be and do what you love. If it were just a dream and anything is possible and okay (it's not hurting anyone) and whatever you choose would happen, what would your life be like then in ten years?